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I desperately want to stop the habit of swatting my child on the butt! Help!

I never wanted to be a spanking mom. But now that the reality of a misbehaving baby is here, it's so hard to keep my cool and find alternative means of discipline. He is 14 months old.

I never swat his butt more than once, and I only do it when he is wearing a diaper, never on a bare butt. I only do it when he is putting himself in real danger or if I tell him no three times.

If he doesn't listen I pick him up and take him away from the situation, swat him on the butt, and tell him why I did it. He usually cries for a minute because he's mad at me, and that makes me feel like the worst mom in the world. I need help!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:06 AM on Dec. 12, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (19)
  • I wouldn't stop. Your not hurting him. Most kids these days are not very well behaved.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Your doing to things at once. Your basically doing a time out and still spanking him. Time out isn't just for him, it's for you too. Keep in mind that he's 14 months old and probably doesn't understand a lot of what your saying. You have to repeat yourself with a baby-he can't count. You need to calm down and not get out of control. Walk away from the situation. I for one don't think that you should do anything to a BABY that young. But since you think it's necessary, I always sit my son down right where he is or if he's doing something he shouldn't I move him away and sit him down.

    And spanking when it's a dangerous situation just makes it worse for the child.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 12:12 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • So what You are doing the right thing by trying to raise a responsible person. You are confusing yourself with a mother who just doesn't give a crap.... Man up, woman... you are doing what is right.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:16 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Instead of spanking him, tell him that what he did was a bad choice and then put him in his crib for 1 minute (time out).

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:19 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Ok, first of all he still a baby he doesn't understand yet the goods and the bads, so try to control yourself and be calm and when u loose it try to get AWAY from the situation, remember been anger is not going to help you.
    Just pull him away from the danger, and give yourself a piece of mind.
    ALso kids behavior doesn't always depends on them, maybe you and your parner should talk about this and try to fix it.

    Good luck!
    And not swatting ;)

    Answer by momverde at 12:29 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • You'll notice that since this whole "its bad to spank" stuff came out kids are acting worse than ever before. I'm not saying beat your child but a smack on the hand if a child is reaching for a pan on a hot stove is okay in my book. The lady that does the home daycare my son goes to has my permission to spank (shes 82 years old and has been doing daycare for over 40 years) if the kids are doing something that could hurt them or someone else. She also does time out. My son is very well behaved and I believe it is because hes getting the same punishment for bad behavior no matter who he is with. We never spank to the point that it leaves marks, its only enough to hurt their feelings really to make them feel bad about the situation because kids in their toddler years really just want to please you. Spare the rod, spoil the child.

    Answer by amyrw at 12:33 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • really want to hurt your kids' feelings? Nice parenting.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 12:37 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Instead of spanking him, tell him that what he did was a bad choice and then put him in his crib for 1 minute (time out).

    This baby is 14mths old, he's not going to understand that he made a bad choice. geez.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:59 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Child proof your house and keep a watchful eye on him. Kudos to you for saying you need to stop. That is the first step. Just realize that babies are not born with full awareness of what is right and wrong. You are not a bad parent at all, just get some perspective of their age. Take time out for you as much as you can. Have someone watch him so you can have some down time. From a teaching perspective a child of 14 months does not have the capacity to understand enough to be punished. To all the others who say the opposite, please take a parenting class.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:07 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Nothing wrong with a swat on the butt. at 14 months old time outs & talking to's are not going to work.

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 8:49 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

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