Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How would you describe a clingy mother? Am I overreacting?

My boyfriend and his mom have a great relationship but she is overly clinging to me. She calls him at least twice a day, no matter how menial the news or advice. He lived with her until we moved in together. One of the things I loved about him, was his relationship with his mom...that's always a good sign right? But she calls him and worries him about everything (seriously). As someone who wants to be his wife, I'm the one women in his life that has to be almost perfect. I bring things up to him, share my advice or give suggestions. Because he's been hit over the head with it or argued with his mom about it, he's so frustrated he doesn't listen or feels like Im naggin. I know it seems weird, but that's because I feel like its weird. I could go on, I just feel like it's tooo much mom and I believe it affects our relationship.

-Feelingsmotheredbymom

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:14 AM on Dec. 12, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • It is time for your boyfriend to clip his wings and attempt to fly on his own. There is nothing wrong with having a good relationship with your mom, but is sounds as mom is having a hard time dealing with the empty nest syndrome. I do believe your boyfriend needs to have a talk with his mother regarding this. Maybe he can spend time one day on the weekend with his mom and she can still feel like she is needed and loved by him. My husband has a great relationship with his mother, he is 45, and that is something I love about him. However, she calls him twice a week unless it is something serious. Good luck.
    ronjwake

    Answer by ronjwake at 2:26 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • I don't think your over reacting at all. Just remeber if you end up marry him, you will have to deal with this through out your marriage. My husband calls his mom all the time and it is really weird. Way too much contact. Every time he has a dilema he calls his mommy. Good luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:24 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • opps I meant his mom, not yours..haha
    ronjwake

    Answer by ronjwake at 2:27 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • All I have to say is, if you plan on marrying this man, either plan to put your foot down now, or prepare to be second place for the rest of your life. My SIL is married to a Mama's Boy and it goes beyond ridiculous. Her husband talks on the phone with his mother for at least an hour, EVERY NIGHT. His mother has always criticized Cindy the entire time they've been married,over 20 years now. They recently went on a weeklong vacation to Mexico and her husband didn't want to go, because he wouldn't be able to talk to his mom while they were gone ( no cell service). How pathetic is that?!? My husband gets along well with his mom, and I am very close with my mom ( I live 10 hours away from her, but I call her 2-3 times a week) but you have to cut the cord at some point.
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 8:36 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Kind of funny, but have him watch Everybody loves Raymond, there is a clingy mother, and a guy who needs to cut the string.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:40 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • How old is he? How long have y'all been together? She may just need to let go gradually. Don't marry until this improves, but if he is frustrated, just back off from the conflict a little. Let him know you will give him some space to deal with it as he sees fit, but that you need to see some maturing. Does he want to marry you as much as you want to be married?
    callmeann

    Answer by callmeann at 10:48 AM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Thanks guys for the advice. He is 27 and so am I. We talk about marriage alot, from my understandin he wants it just as much as me..lol We already have one daughter and one on the way. I agree that if it doesn't change, I will be dealing with this when we do get married. I have told him we including my family will have to discuss things and come to general respect for each other before we go down the aisle. I am considering have a conversation with his mom face to face about any issues she may have with me and share my feelings on how she treats me. I am very tired of not speaking up and let them react anyway they like. Im not trying to be her daughter, just get along for our familys sake.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:27 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN