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Would this bug you? I was baking cookies and my husband was in the kitchen with me. The first batch was done and I wanted to share some with the neighbors. I asked my husband to take out the other batch when the timer went off if I wasn't back. He was in the kitchen so it wasn't like I was asking him to go out of his way. When I got back the first thing he said to me was, "I left them in a little longer".

I didn't register right away what he was saying to me. I saw the cookies and they were nearly burned. I turned to him and asked why he didn't take them out when they were done. He says to me that he didn't hear the timer go off....I was so mad because I spent all that time putting those together and I asked him to do one thing. He agreed to do it and gives me some crap about how he decided to leave them in a little longer. When I am upset over it he changes his story and says he didn't hear the timer go off. He constantly lies to me or gets defensive about mistakes he makes. Instead of just saying what is what, and saying sorry, he pulls crap like that. I hate it mostly because he makes me out to be crazy with my 'accusations' against him. This time he admitted to leaving them in the oven until I got upset. Would this bug you? Are all men like this? All I know is that a dozen cookies are ruined and he isn't to blame at all.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:12 PM on Dec. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • this is sooooooo my husband. he gets so annoying at times. i'm not trying to make things worse, but sometimes if u dont' make a big deal. he'll only do it more. attention cravers! i mean there are other ways to get attention right? my husband stopped doing that when i would yell at him every time. i'd be like if u needed attention tell me, i'll give u a hug, just don't screw things up for me! u know... so let him know, if he still doesn't get it. screw something up for him.lol.evil but it'll do the trick.
    fefe87

    Answer by fefe87 at 12:15 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Typical guy....Guys could care less about these things. Unfortunately, changing this behavior will probably never happen. Think of it this way, this is something important to you & he could less no matter what you put into it & the entire project you have to do on your own. You don't need a guy to make cookies. You can't control or change this. Sorry.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:18 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • OP: This isn't about needing him to make cookies. It is just common decency. He asks me to help in last minute situations all the time and I do because we all need a hand once in a while. I thought he would be fine with doing it because he came in and just started asking me about it and he loves to cook. I didn't think he would just screw it up like that. I bet you are right fefe87, it probably is for attention.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Ask me last week.... And I would have said that I would have been so ticked off i would have thrown the cookies at him. Ask me today (which you are).... it's not a big deal. There are bigger fish to fry then worrying about a dozen cookies. Yeah it's annoying, but to me anymore that's one of those things that's not a big deal. Right now my husband is on the verge of leaving me because I kept getting mad at him over the little things(like cookies). he made a mistake, whether he didn't hear the timer or he didn't think they were done, it's a dozen cookies. It's like getting mad at him for spilling some water. Just sit back and think about it, when you were dating would you have gotten mad at him, or would you have been like "aww baby it's ok I'll just make some more"? To me anymore getting mad over little things aren't worth losing my husband. Guys can only take so much before they break.... and I've broken mine from doing things
    Zacherysmommy08

    Answer by Zacherysmommy08 at 12:27 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • next time your he is cooking something and he asks you to watch it or take it out when its done, DONT and when its ruined just tell you you decided to leave it in little longer.

    soonmommyof3

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 12:28 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Op: ARE YOU KIDDING ME ZACHERYSMOMMY08??? This is NOT the same as spilling some water. This was MY project and if he didn't want to help then say no. Don't agree to something that you are not willing to really do. I don't nag my husband. I do things for myself, I am good to him, I don't bug him over stupid little things. I am not even mad about the stupid cookies because they are just cookies. I mean it sucks that that is a waste of money but it isn't the end of the world. I told him that as well. This is really about him lieing to me about what happened when he should just tell the truth and say sorry. He is a grown man. He needs to take responsibility for his short comings. That doesn't mean I am going to nag him about them. It is just decent to me and to others to not agree to do things if you aren't really going to do it and if you agree and mess up just say sorry. It sounds like you have no back bone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:33 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Zachery..... I'm with you. I agree with you. It's sounds like she is just not ready to hear the answer you've suggested because it requires lots of maturity & giving up being selfishness. I'm happy to hear you understand how to treat your husband. He will be all the better because of it.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:37 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • AHHH get over it. That is what marriage and life is all about. If you grip about the small stuff right now, what will you do when you get into REAL problems? Let it go.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:58 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Op: Yeah it is really mature to allow your husband to act like a child. I treat my husband great. I don't ask much of him, I don't nag him. Once in a while I ask for a little help and if it doesn't go my way I don't care I just appreaciate his effort. But this is different because he didn't try and he just lied about it. If he can't be honest about this, what does that say about his character? It is plain and simple...be an adult an own up to your mistakes and apologize. I thought other wives would be supportive of this. I guess I am wrong. Women just feel it is their duty to be submissive instead of having self respect. Well, then go for it. But you can honor your husband and YOURSELF. And if you don't honor yoursefl frst he never will.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:01 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • OP: I did let it go with him. I just said to him that it sucks he couldn't just be honest and say sorry instead of trying to pick a fight with me over his part in it. I walked away and that was that. Now it has blown over. Like I said I don't nag him and I won't over this. I just came here to get a little support from other women.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:03 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

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