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How can I bond with my 20 month old and fix some underlying issues?

She barely talks, because she is learning Spanish and English, although she will let you know with great effort as to what she wants.
She's hit the "pre-terrible twos".
I am a single mom. I go to school full time.
I find it hard to get her into a routine. Her grandmother (her father's mother) spoils her.
She is the first grandchild, but she lets my daughter fall asleep with her every night. So, when my child comes to stay with me, she will not fall asleep unless she's in my bed, which I believe is unacceptable.
I'm trying to break her of the pacifier and have no luck because THEY ALWAYS GIVE IT TO HER.
I'm her mother and when I ask for a routine to be made (an acceptable one) then I expect my daughter to be in bed by 8pm, NOT MIDNIGHT.
I'm going crazy, what can I do?


Asked by sherrybaby84 at 12:47 PM on Dec. 12, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (4)
  • this is a tough situation because since you are in school FT I am sure money is tight so this child care may be whats easiest for your child and financially...Me being a FT student with LO I understand the need for them to be on a good schedule! I would die if they ahd that schedule with my intense school I often study after bedtime! I would firmly talk to them and maybe see if there are other alternatives of child care and maybe tell them why you need her on a routine try being nice at first...LOL Sounds like you are frustrated which I can understand...Good luck in school!

    Answer by hill2 at 8:47 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Find different childcare.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 1:08 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • As you said your the MOM, you have to put your foot down a routine is needed for children of her age.
    My son is nearly 2 and it was hard but we got him off the pacifier and into a big boys bed,etc he also is going through the terrible 2's.
    My parents also let my son do whatever when their around because grandparents are there to spoil but you have to sit down with a writen schedule and tell them what needs to be done if they can't comply you'll have to seek other means of child minding.
    They need to respect your wishes because you as her mom knows best.
    Plus you little girl is going to be very confused now.
    Best of luck

    Answer by laika at 1:12 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • You may have tried this already, but you might try talking to your ex about it, and have him talk to his mom. Tell him what needs to change, and why (even look up some stuff and give him literature on it), and ask for his support. If you can get him on board, it will make it much easier to get grandma on board.
    I wish I could offer more, but I wish you good luck!!

    Answer by musicpisces at 4:12 AM on Dec. 13, 2009