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What do you feel is your duty as a wife (not a mother). What do you feel is the right way for you to be treated as well?

I have seen many people saying that it is their job to keep their husbands happy. I just don't agree with that. You can't be responsible for another person's happiness. I believe you have a responsibility TO eachother. Meaning that you each bring to the table things that would contribute to a better life for eachother and for the family. I also think that you do you best to protect the one you love. You do that by trying to be objective about the way you treat eachother. Pay attention to the way you speak to eachother and the way they you repsect eachother's space and time. I think an important thing a wife can contribute to her husbands well being is affirmations. I think because men ultimately want to please you that if you talk about ALL he has done wrong he will shut down. I think if you talk about the things he does that are helpful and nice he will feel appreaciated. Also complimenting him. Most men don't..CONT..

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IzzeAddy

Asked by IzzeAddy at 1:23 PM on Dec. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Level 9 (312 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • don't tell eachother how nice they look like women tend to do for eachother. So it is nice to hear from their wives things like that. I think that the best thing husbands can do is to pull their weight around the house. If he works that is great but that is different from what happens at home. I think husbands should consider that while they may work full time eventually they get to clock out while housework and tending to kids never ends. So it would be important for him to remember that and help at home. Also, to remember that when they are hanging out having fun that the woman in their live deserves that too. I could go on and on but I will stop so I can hear what you think...
    IzzeAddy

    Answer by IzzeAddy at 1:26 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • As a wife. Hm. I FEEL it's my DUTY to satisfy him sexually and thats about it. As a HOUSEwife I feel it's my duty to keep the house straightened up and do the grocery shopping and cook dinner - when I feel like it. It's my duty to communicate my feelings to him. It is my duty to support him and stay faithful to him. All I want is to be appreciated.
    SandraB383

    Answer by SandraB383 at 1:30 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • I feel that it's my duty to always be his best friend. I think that my marriage will truly last because of the fact that while we are lovers, we are also really, really great friends that geuinely enjoy being together. We've been together for 6 years, married for over one year. We laugh a LOT, and we treat each other as equals...though he is a bit softer with me. :) We don't really have set roles, though the contributions we each make are fairly traditional. He works, I'm a SAHM. I keep the house spotless, but he cooks. When he's home, he'll help clean, etc. We don't look at it like we HAVE to do these things, we just work as a team, and do what needs done. We always have the same goal in mind. I do compliement him, mainly on how he provides everything I could want for me and my son, and he works hard. I never have to worry, and that's a huge gift. And he always knows he'll have a best friend waiting when he gets home. :)
    StefanieN84

    Answer by StefanieN84 at 1:43 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Ok interesting question. Most men want a woman that cooks, cleans, sexually satisfies, takes care of the kids, does the shopping, deal with the bills, and works. But what should we do? I think if a man does all that stuff with you then that is the what should happen. it is a two way street and if he wants you to do all that then he should help. I think if I am not working then yeah house is mine to deal with and I am better at the money issues than he is so I do that. As far as the kids I believe it is equality and I think that their should be a mutal respect in the relationship. My duty as a wife is to be the best I can be. I think there should be communication and a partnership. But I contridict myself because I cook, clean and all that and serve him his dinner and rub him down just because I am a giving person to him. I should be treated right without abuse of any kind but same thing it is a two way street. I think he CONT
    JHawk83

    Answer by JHawk83 at 1:55 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Well, I believe as a Christian , I am to be his helper, his companion. To honor and respect him and submit to him as the head of the household. 1Peter chapter 3. I agree that it is not a wife's job to maker her husband happy, true happiness can only come from the Lord. I feel that it is hid duty to treat me with love, and provide for us, protect us,and make sure that we are in good spiritual health. "Us" and "We" being my self and our children.
    nkkk07

    Answer by nkkk07 at 1:55 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • My hubby and I believe that while he is at work he is giving 100% at work , meanwhile I am giving 100% with house work and baby. So when he clocks out he gets to come home so that he and I BOTH get to do 50% till DD goes to bed then and only then do we get breaks. If he is on a day off we both tend to DD equally 50/50. That works for us and I believe it is the only fair way to make things work
    heather.darin

    Answer by heather.darin at 1:57 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • I think he should do the same things for me that i do for him. I rub his back he rubs mine, but if you find that guy let me know because it does not work that way. the man will always think he does more and deserves more than you do. It is never equals when they are concerned. What I do as a wife is take care of my husband what my husband does for me is tries his best to support us. He does not always succeed but he tries and that is all I ask of him
    JHawk83

    Answer by JHawk83 at 1:57 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • Jhawk: I do not agree. While most men think they deserve more and work harder mine insists that I do. He truely respects me and treats me the way he and I both know I should be treated and I, him. He supports us financially and still insists on coming home and helping with dinner / dishes or more. We are equals I know people think it is the honey moon phase but truely it didn't start that way. He was off work for several weeks and I left the house and baby to him 100% to teach him that I do work. Now he insists that I work hard and says he could never do what I do:) He is a wonderful man and I think we are a great match and work well together....BTW we have been Living together for almost 5 years now
    heather.darin

    Answer by heather.darin at 2:03 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • sandra b383,I was amazed by your answer that you feel sex is a duty! It should be something you do together as a loving couple,not something he's ENTITLED to! My marriage isn't so much a duty as an agreement.We decided that I would be a stay at home mom and do all the duties of the home(except yardwork) and he would work to support us.If one of us is not up to sex for whatever reason,the other understands9and might grumble silently) but I've never felt I had to do it out of duty! I'm not a prostitute,I'm a wife!
    TMJ121099

    Answer by TMJ121099 at 3:52 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

  • lol :) I said it was how I feel. Plus, its not something difficult to accomplish nor is it something I ever mind doing. I LOVE LOVE LOVE to satisfy him =x hahaha. You could even say I pride myself on it. *shrug*
    SandraB383

    Answer by SandraB383 at 5:27 PM on Dec. 12, 2009

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