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Why are you so freaking mean???

Some of you moms on here, need to be nice!!!

Calling other moms bad moms because they don't breastfeed?? Umm excuse me, I didn't have a choice. I hardly got any milk at all, and trust me I went through 6 weeks of trying everything in the book to get my milk to come in. It didn't "fully" come in with either child, so yes I HAD to supplement with formula.

Calling other moms child abusers because they choose to circumcise their sons? What the heck!!!

Calling other moms bad moms because they choose to spank, or disposable diaper, or co-sleep, or CIO, or whatever!

I have my opinions on what the best way to raise my child is, but I would never make anyone feel like less of a mother because they do it differently.

Can't we all just play nice?


Asked by Anonymous at 6:20 AM on Dec. 13, 2009 in Just for Fun

This question is closed.
Answers (31)
  • That's women for ya! Catty, competitive, insecure, opportunistic, shallow, materialistic, manipulative, and condescending! Seriously, it's why in 40+ years on this planet I can honestly say I've never had a lifelong girlfriend--friends come and go, usually because of the reasons listed--and I don;t feel like I've missed out on anything! Who has time for all that? I know I don't! LOL

    OP--you just keep doing what you feel is what is best for YOUR child. If your child is happy, well-mannered, personable, does well in school, has hobbies/interests (all in due time if you have a very young child), then you are a good parent. I think all of this cattiness stems from other women with major insecurities and feelings of inadequacy--and they have to prove they are somehow smarter, better, or stronger than their mother's were when raising them! :o)

    Answer by LoriKeet at 6:46 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • i know how you feel. and no we obviously can't because some women think they are gods gift to cafe mom, and must preach their BS propaganda 24/7

    Answer by Hali_Taylor at 6:25 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Every one has their own opinions.

    Answer by louise2 at 8:02 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Totally agree with you, it is a personal choice and nobody should make you feel any less of a mother for not doing it!

    Answer by older at 8:07 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Well, I do agree with you of course, but I will say that this is the most common complaint here on CM. The last 3 years have been riddled with questions like this and people just demanding that others stop being mean and moms defending their choices. Its pointless. You did what you could for your child and thats all you can do. I have not and will never try to defend my choices to another mom, whom I dont know, nor doesnt care about me and my child. Just to make you feel better, I had a breast reduction a year after my 3rd child was born, so when my 4th one was born, I didnt lactate at all. I had to have that surgery to help stop the pain in my back and generally give me a better life. I deserved it and it was the best thing I ve ever done. One of the side effects was that I could not lactate sufficiently to nurish a baby. There was hardly any milk at all. I knew from the beginning it would be that way. Its life. Just ignore.

    Answer by momofsaee4 at 8:20 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Wow! women are horrible sometimes. those women would have no liked my mom!! I had the BEST mother ever growing up and she did not breast feed me (I turned out fine!), she layed in bed with me until i could fall asleep until i was like 7(I was terrified of the dark and always drug her into my room), and she spanked me when i was bad! WHO CARES. my mother was wonderful and i turned out great! :)
    Dont let anyone tell you how to raise your children.. as long as you arent abusive then your parenting is up to YOU.

    Answer by maybebaby83 at 8:25 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • maybebaby83, that is the problem. What one mother considers 'parenting' another might consider abusive. I happen to think spanking and CIO are child abuse and other mothers think it's perfectly fine- it's all how you define good parenting.


    Answer by IhartU at 9:13 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Imo, I believe its because some women actually get a thrill out of it. I mean think about it, if they're miserable then they come here trying to make others feel miserable too. I am disappointed that a site meant for moms to come to vent, get & or give advice, meet other moms in situations or circumstances surrounding their kids disabilities, to make friends(some are!), has some women that are just vicious, mean, catty, & their uncalled for cruelty. All I can say is that when any mom posts a question that can pull in negative attention, she should be mindful of it and learn to let the negativity roll off her back like water. We all need something from this site(why else would we waste our time being here!?), so embrace the good, the bad, & the ugly & apply it all so that you will not unintentionally end up doing it too. & if a mom is brave enough not to post anon, don't kick her when she's down & out because you're stooping 2

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 9:16 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Half of the mean people aren't even moms. They're trolls.

    Answer by caitxrawks at 9:18 AM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • her level. Also remember that both men and women that are arrogant think their shit don't stink so they treat and react to certain people, situations, places, and things as though they are dirt. This proves that even a site meant for women is imperfect due to selfishness(inconsideration for another's thoughts or feelings make it selfish.)

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 9:20 AM on Dec. 13, 2009