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Do you lie to your kids?

There have been many posts recently about lying. Some parents claim to NEVER lie to their kids. They say a lie is a lie. I say if a lie is a lie, then there is no way no one ever lies to their kids. I believe there are many types of lies and not all are bad. So, have you lied recently to your kids and what have those lies been?

 
wildboyz1994

Asked by wildboyz1994 at 6:04 PM on Dec. 13, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (27)
  • Sure...all the time. As in telling him about Santa, encouraging him to believe in magic and fairy tales....other things like the Easter bunny. Are these lies? Yes, in the truest sense they are lies. But I also see them as allowing him to build on his imagination and anticipation of wondrous things to come. Don't let us leave out the Tooth Fairy. I lie and say there are no monsters or bad things out there to hurt us. Well, there are. Some people are monsters and do hurt children. For now, at three, his world needs to be safe and secure. So to answer the question: I do lie. I also lied and said I lost the whistle his grandma gave him. This was to save my ears. Any parent who says they NEVER lie is not being very truthful. We all do to some degree.  It is really about knowing if this "lie" is damaging or not to your child.

    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 11:31 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • I will get it started. My older son is 15 and he is really into card tricks lately. Today he said "Mom, do you want to see a card trick" and I said "sure" but really, the last thing I felt like doing was watching his 100th card trick of the day. He did not say "will you watch a card trick" he said "do you WANT to watch a card trick" .
    wildboyz1994

    Answer by wildboyz1994 at 6:06 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • First of all, I believe there are rules, exceptions to the rules and exception to the exceptions. When they were young, I lied by telling them about Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Halloween and Tooth Fairy. As they got older, I stopped all that. I now lie to them about how I get things done. A lot goes on behind the scenes that I really don't feel they have to know about.
    Ewadun

    Answer by Ewadun at 6:09 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • I now lie to them about how I get things done. A lot goes on behind the scenes that I really don't feel they have to know about.

    OK, you got me interested.. what does that mean?
    wildboyz1994

    Answer by wildboyz1994 at 6:10 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Hmmm, I try to be honest in all my dealings but when it comes to my kids I think sometimes not giving them the whole "pie" is better.

    I dont think lying is always hurtful especially if its done with someones wellbeing in mind.

    I cant think of anything recently that I said to my boys that would be lying per se. Ill come back if I can think of something.
    Amaranth361

    Answer by Amaranth361 at 6:12 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • My son knocked on the door while DH and I were having sex. He said, what are you doing? We said "nothing. just taking a little nap"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:16 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • I make great efforts not to. And I can't think of a lie that I have told them. but they are young yet, so I'm sure at some point it will happen. But that doesn't mean that I think its right, just means that I know I will screw up, who doesn't? Now I'm not agains ommitting the truth. If my son asks something and I don't feel he is ready to understand, I'll flat out tell him, at this point in time, it does not concern you, or it is non of your buisness so don't worry about it, or flat out, its non of your buisness.

    daughteroftruth

    Answer by daughteroftruth at 7:08 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Yep, I refused to let my son know that his grandfather drank himself to death and lay dead for 3 days before anyone found him. Shame on me for sugar coating that whole dead grandpa thing to "grandpa was sick."
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:15 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • i did,.. I do not like lying. but i count tell a four year old that i was crying because her daddy cheated on me,... so i just said i was sad about a bad dream.. i do not like lying or being deceitful and i hate when it is done to me,. i try to not be a hipocrit and teach by my example..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:39 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Sure...I lie. When dd asked how old I was, I said 25. Total lie. When she asks if I like her dad, I say of course I do! Lie. If she asks if I love the cats, I say yes. Lie.
    My point being yeah, I do lie to her, but not about *big* things. When a friend died in a car accident I told her why I was sad. When she asked questions about death, I answered honestly. When she's asked sex questions, I tell the truth. I decide to fib when it will not affect her in the long run. I mean what's the harm in her thinking I'm 25???
    michelle121003

    Answer by michelle121003 at 10:31 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

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