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Just friends...right?

Hey, Im 22 and 8 months along, Im engaged to a most awesome man. (and yes the baby is his.) We have had our ups and downs in the last three years, (he proposed when we had been going out for 2 months bleah) and lately I have gotten back in contact with my friend who is pretty close to me, he happens to be hot(where as my man is... 350 pounds ), and careing.. me and my friend have known eachother sence high school so about 3-4 years. He is in a crappy way with his wife and Im getting kinda bord of my man... I love him.. I just wish he were more active.. where as, my friend is...

I dont think im going to jump ship anytime soon.. but I think he has been dropping signals... and I might have been too with out relaizing it.. Although we are close... and relitivly attracted to each other we've never kissed... even when both of us were single... and now I think we want to but we have our loved ones...

any advice at al

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:58 PM on Dec. 13, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • My advice is you sound very unsure of spending the rest of your life with your fiance. I would definately not walk down the aisle feeling as you are. If you truly love your fiance then you can't be friends with this old friend-flame. That is just an affair waiting to happen. Flip it...would you be comfortable with your fiance having a relationship with a "friend" he's interested in as you so obviously are? Its just not fair to him.
    If you don't love your man with his weight and possibly more weight because marriage tends to do that to both men and women...you have alot of thinking to do.
    MamaChamp

    Answer by MamaChamp at 9:02 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Do not do anything with him tell you leave your current relationship.  And after you find out he is really into you like that.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:05 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • unless you're prepared to lose your fiance, DON:T DO IT!!!! It will only lead to mistrust, hurt, and even a break/up divorce. If that's what you want then at least dump your guy first. But think, if you do kiss him and theres nothing there, then your fiance finds out, whats gonna happen? My fiance made out with another girl at a party when he was drunk....i wasn't there, but i dragged it out of him and even though we are still together, it still hurts me and bothers me to this day. I still don't trust him 100%....he's only about a 75% right now....and he knows this. It definately hurt our relationship and I;ve told him if it happens again he's out the door without a 2nd thought. but choose wisely and feel free to message me if u need to talk
    CTC7122006

    Answer by CTC7122006 at 9:05 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • well the thing is, Im not sure if I like him sexually or if its just like.. he is really close and I dont know what to label it as, My friend is going to be the god father of my baby, and I would do just about anything for him he is a great guy, but I know he would never treat me as good as my Man. But my friend and my hubby ADORE eachother lol, I mean it makes me happy. But you see I want to make my friend happy, and I like to hug him a lot and I know he would protect me... but Im not sure if thats a relationship waiting to happen (which although he IS super fine I cant see myself kissing him romanticly) or somthing else..
    oh and btw my hubby used to sneek phone calls to his ex and feel all guilty when he couldnt answer them... and then he would bi*ch about it to me... so I can understand the whole mistrust thing. Maybe not in the same light as you but, kinda close.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • If you love your husband don't talk to this man anymore and be thankful it stopped at that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:01 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • I would not marry your man if you feel this way.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:18 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Number one get out of the relationship you are in if you do not like it. Number two the man is married! I do not know why people think it is okay to cheat on each other. My exhusband cheated on me and it was horrible. Until you know how it it feels you have no right to destroy a marriage no matter how much he ssays it is horrible and remember you are only hearing his side of the story not hers.
    seashore29

    Answer by seashore29 at 10:21 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • RUN AWAY FROM THIS MARRIED MAN LOOKING FOR SEX! You need to terminate this friendship, it's not healthy. As the saying goes.... Do you really think you can look, but don't touch, touch but don't taste, taste but don't swallow, lick it, but don't stick it? If you can't overcome the temptation now, you shouldn't get married. Once you say I do, it's gonna rain fine ass sexy men and the grass always, always looks greener on the other side. Come on, who are we really kidding? The man is married. He's gonna tell you whatever he thinks you need to hear to get you in bed. So what your fiance is overweight and not as active? Honey, when you grow older you're gonna wish you'd marry for love, companionship and security.
    Ewadun

    Answer by Ewadun at 10:38 PM on Dec. 13, 2009

  • Honestly it sounds like you and this man may be doing something soon just from the sounds of it. BEFORE you do ANYTHING and it may be hard but you need to tell your man that you no longer want to be with him and break it off. It's better to break his heart this way then to break his heart by cheating on him. And remember that the grass is not always greener on ther other side.
    funmommy123

    Answer by funmommy123 at 12:20 AM on Dec. 14, 2009

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