Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you think people are too easy on kids nowadays??

So, I was on the phone with my mom today. And she told me the schools in her area next year are doing away with "old fashioned" sports tryouts. Basically you show up for "tryouts" you make the team. You don't even have to try! And it seems more and more I am hearing things like this, every team getting a trophy whether they won or not! What is wrong with being like, ok son/daughter maybe football cheerleading soccer etc. isn't your niche why don't we figure out what is! What is wrong with letting our kids fall and pick themselves back up? What happened to learning through adversity? I know sooo many moms and dads these days that just don't want their kids ever told "no". I DO! Because what happens when they get to the real world and don't always get the job, or promotion or loan etc. How will they learn to deal? Am I the only one left who thinks kids need to learn through trial and error? Is that not the point of LIFE?

Answer Question

Asked by SweetPea05 at 6:25 PM on Dec. 14, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 8 (230 Credits)
Answers (26)
  • It isn't any better to have everyone make the team you will find out. Your child will sit on the bench and watch the coach's kids and friends play. The coach here told the girls they were fat and slow, the ones that gave blood threw up from too much running and he didn't care. One girl with asthma couldn't breath and he told her she was a baby and made her run more. Yep, we are way too easy on our kids now days.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:29 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • I think it's needs to go back to trying out for the team. Life is not easy & kids need to realize they don't always get what they want. That's way we have 40 year olds still living at home.

    Answer by mommorgan at 6:29 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • Thank you! I was sooooo baffled when my mom told me this and said she was GLAD! Granted my 13 year old sister doesn't know how to ride a bike and my mom writes her notes to get her outta gym class cuz its "too hard". And let me tell ya, my sis is worse for it! I didn't always get the part in the play I wanted, I didn't make the cheer squad I wanted and I am one tough b!@$# Lemme tell ya! Siiiiigh.... Kids these days are being raised to get everything they want it is so ridiculous and talk about crippling our future! Granted my oldest is only two, but still she is going to learn the hard way! Even now she doesn't get everything she asks for and when she falls down, I let her (literally) get herself back up. She almost NEVER cries when she falls unless she is really hurt and only then does mommy pick her up, otherwise she soothes herself! And I intend to keep her being the independent little firecracker she is!

    Answer by SweetPea05 at 6:34 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • Here's something else to ponder: In my area, all the public school activities are going towards that same philosophy. You don't need to "try" at the try-outs - just show up, and you've made the team. However, I've noticed that the private clubs like gymnastic cheerleading squads, select baseball/football/basketball teams, etc. still require the traditional try-outs. It's like you have to pay someone to constructively critique your child.

    Just food for thought!

    Answer by redmoonintexas at 7:13 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • Oooo, while we're on the subject: A co-worker of mine was complaining because her son had too much math homework. She said he spent 30-45 min on it every night. I gave her a look wondering if she was joking. I asked her what her expectations are for high school and college. She had obviously not thought that far ahead for her kid with the look on her face. She did point out that she wasn't the only parent in the class that had a problem with the homework.

    If we can't push our kids to work hard, even with a little friendly competition, what can we expect out of the future generations?

    Answer by redmoonintexas at 7:16 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • That is ridiculous redmoon! Sigh. I am kind of afraid to see what our future is going to turn into if this is how children are being raised.... if they all expect to get whatever it is they want! And all that without having to try! Even my younger siblings seem to be being raised differently than I was and there is a definite difference in how we handle things in life.

    Answer by SweetPea05 at 7:17 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • I totally hear you on this one. I can't stand how lax everyone has gotten on everything. Parenting, coaching, teaching. I mean seriously what do we want from our children, to grow up to be a whole lot of pansies???

    My neighbor actually told me that she does her son's homework for him because she thinks it stupid! Yes ladies, she thinks it's stupid for her son to have to do 5 pages of homework (1 for each subject) a night. Mind you we're talking about spelling words, math, grammer, writing (practicing penminship). But it's too much so she does it for him. It's crazy to me.

    Though my honey is the same way with his son and daughter, as is their mother. They think it's too much so they don't make them do it, they either do it for them or give them the answers. Because they think it's stupid. That won't be me. But different strokes for different folks!?

    Answer by smilinghug at 7:40 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • Because in a fat America the last thing we should do is discourage the less athletic kids to give up on sports and excercise and sit on the couch crying eating Big Macs when they could have been out there on the field trying to be healthy.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • We used to have try outs when I was a 6th grader. I did not make cheerleading because my parents had no money to put me in special classes my entire childhood so I didn't know everything I needed to know.
    In 7th grade they changed to to where you had to write an essay saying why you would be good and if you wrote a great essay you got a spot on the squad. This weeded out the people who didn't want it. I made it. Because I got this chance I ended up getting a full scholarship for cheerleading to the University of Texas and graduated with honors. I would likely have not had the money to even go to college had I not been given that chance. I think there is nothing wrong with this. I think it is selfish of parents to discourage children from working towards their dreams.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:21 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • Omg.... I never said duscourage kids from exercise. Lol angry Anons will pull something out of nothing! All I am saying is if you are not good at football find something else, you know track soccer basketball baton twirling. I was merely using sports as an EXAMPLE to point out how we are no longer teaching kids that you don't always get what you want and how to deal with that.
    As for Anon :21 that is pretty cool. I understand the no classes thing, that is why in high school I only got JV squad not varsity, I didn't have enough gymnastic training! Anyway, I think that essay idea is pretty dang cool and look where it got you! Way to go, and you had to DO something to get what you wanted! I will never discourage my kids from their dreams, my point is if they weren't good enough then work harder and come back next year!! That is life.

    Answer by SweetPea05 at 8:26 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.