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What was I suppose to say? Was I wrong?

My son saw my ex the other day while we were driving (not my son's dad) and said he was crying. He asked me to invite him over because he missed us and the he missed him... he was almost in tears. I had no clue what to say... my son is 6 1/2. I broke up with my ex after a little more than two years of crappiness... he was an alcoholic, judgemental, unloving, never around, emotionally and verbally abusive then he harrassed me for a while after the break-up. I didn't feel safe anymore... not after the threats of harming me. When my son asked me this, I wanted to cry... I told him that he wasn't allowed to come over and that he never would again, that he has problems that he has to deal with... I even told him that I really don't know what to tell him.

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:26 PM on Dec. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • children are innocent, they don't understand the problems of our adult world. you didn't do anything wrong, you're protecting yourself and your family and that's all that matters.

    Answer by flaggot13 at 6:29 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • i agree with flaggot13 ..

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:33 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • well after what you have been through in that past relationship with that man i dont blame you for feeling the way you do and no i dont think what you said to your son was wrong.

    Answer by lil26bit at 7:25 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • I don't think you were wrong. You can't sugar coat things with kids forever. Your son is still very young, but he still needs to know that you keep him safe. And if someone that is/was in his life isn't safe for him, then they can't come around.

    Answer by Raine2001 at 7:49 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • You did the right thing! It is okay to be simply honest with your child.

    "I only allow myself to be around people who are nice to me. And "ex" was not nice to Mommy. He used very mean words to speak to me with and it is not okay to do that."

    Answer by TLALONDE16 at 7:54 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

  • Thanks ladies... I feel so much better.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:16 PM on Dec. 14, 2009

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