Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would You Do It?

Okay here's the back round to my question:
I used to work at a gentlemen's club. This is the nicest club in a major city. Just topless, no poles or lapdances or private rooms. Nothing nasty. I used to be able to make good money. I quit after my ex mil told my mother where I worked and she pretty much black mailed me into quiting. I always planned on going back. Now I am engaged to a wonderful man who wants me to continue to be a stay at home mom, but we never have any money! He got injured and is barely working and we cannot afford to send my daughter to daycare and have me work during the day. I want to go back to working three nights a week until he finishes school and can actually support us( this would be in six months tops). He is telling me no.
So My question is this: Would you try and push it, if you knew you needed the money really bad? Also I can no longer afford insurance and I have some major health problems.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:14 PM on Dec. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Here's my advice: go back to school and get a better career. Try to do something respectable. I wouldn't push the issue w/ your fiance, he loves you, of course he doesn't want men leering at your naked body.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • Try to find something legitimate to do. You have kids. You can't do that for a living anymore.

    Answer by mompam at 12:20 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • i wouldnt do it. I'm sure you're a smart woman and there are other things that you can do that will keep your status as woman, wife and mother clean and intact. I know that you want to help him, that already makes you a good woman. Respect his wishes and maybe there are other jobs that you can do.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:21 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • Honestly, I have thought about doing it when money gets tight. My husband has no issue with it though. I would say try and find something else to do since he seems to be really against it because you don't want to cause any more trouble.

    Answer by purpleducky at 12:23 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • You don't want to put any strain on your relationship. Be bartender, waitress, they do good.

    IF my man dances half nude it will be for me. Somethings are just too personal. I would respect your man and kids, and keep your clothes on.

    Find another way, there has to be one. :) Good luck!!!

    Answer by KFree907 at 12:27 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • I work 2 jobs and one of them is being a dancer also. I understand the not having money for the needs in your life. My husband hates it also. But he loves the money. Your man should consider that it is temporary and let you do what needs to be done. If it were me I would go for it especially if kids are involved. Good luck.

    Answer by Angie198029 at 12:45 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • Thanks Angie.
    It's not like I haven't gone to school. I have. But I cannot find work in my field. Nor have I been able to find anything at night( which is when I have time to work) that is worth it. I can't take out any loans to go for more schooling, since my ex left me so far in debt. I also am going to be without health insurance soon and have medical needs that would make it dangerous for me to be uninsured. I've tried to back to retail, I've done medical studies and research studies for money and I am unable to sell plasma( medical reasons). Not everyone who chooses to be an entertainer is dumb and lazy and hasn't gone to college.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:57 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • No, I would not push the issue with my husband. You might qualify for Medicaid for your children in the mean time until your DH can begin working again. I know it would be MUCH less money, but if you are willing to work after hours, why not a 24hr Walmart or some other place that would be agreeable to him?

    Answer by WindyTheWidow at 3:20 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • Mostly because I can't get $500 an hour and only work two nights a week at Wal-Mart. My daughter's insurance isn't an issue, she is covered just fine. No where around here is hiring for night shifts except UPS. I do not fit their lifting requirements. I have the ability to do an in home business but I need funds for insurance first until my client base picks up. I pretty much feel at this point that I'm f'd if I do and f'd if I don't .

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.