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How can I get my 11 year old daughter to understand the Sacraments of the Catholic Church are important?

We have really tried to instill in her the importance of attending Mass and CCD. She refuses to attend only our church. She thinks the Christian Church is better for her, but it isn't. They totally miss the the point on several key issues of our church and our . I don't mind her attending the other church's activities as long as she has ful-filled her obligations to our Catholic Faith. She just seems so vewry defiant these days and I just don't know where to turn. Please Help!

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Asked by Mary67 at 12:37 PM on Dec. 15, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

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Answers (21)
  • You can "force" her to attend your church untill she's 18, but you'll never be able to "force" her to believe anything...that must come from within. 



    Answer by MamaK88 at 12:42 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • I feel sad for her.

    Answer by IhartU at 12:45 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • You can't MAKE her believe what you do, if she doesn't feel the same way... My parents made me go to Catholic church until I was 16, then I was allowed to make up my own mind. Never went back. You can't force a specific religion on somebody, period. At least she still wants to attend A church, just not YOUR church. Allow her to make up her own mind, please.

    Answer by Anouck at 12:50 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • If she is responsible and well behaved, care, compassionate but just refuses to attend Your Choice church then freaking out about it will push her away. Do you believe she will go to hell if she attends a different faith's church or are the people there bad in character? If it's just that their bad in character then that's a reason to disallow that. You do that by tracking her calls and whereabouts and not allowing her out on those days. Take her elsewhere and stay. My kids are adults and teen all three still talk openly to me cause I pressed their rights of interest with responsibility to themselves and others because of their own actions and actions of others.

    My daughter's (17 yo) never had facebook or myspace and I stopped her i m system because of attitudes of kids. My girls want to attend church, my 17 yo in a church with kids running wild. Instead we go where what's preached is practiced in and out of church.

    Answer by lfl at 12:54 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • Is there something about your parish that is turning her off? Is there something about a specific protestant church that is appealing to her? I'm wondering if the protestant church has more youth activities. Does another Catholic parish in your town have a larger youth population? Has she ever gone to World Youth Day or to any kind of Catholic teen or preteen retreat? And I hate to suggest this, but do you think she might be being coersed by a friend to attend the protestant church?

    Maybe she is questioning the faith/doesn't understand the faith. If you get a subscription to This Rock Magazine not only might you be better able to help her understand Catholicism, but she might pick it up and read it.

    Many books are published now that cater to explaining the faith to youth. See if something here might help her.

    Answer by flatlanderjenn at 1:06 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • if this is the biggest of your problems with your daughter you have it pretty good. It sounds like she is a good girl trying to find the path that corrosponds with her heart. You should not pressure her to do things just your way...t at will make her resentful of the church and you. Love her for who she is. It is okay that she has differing opinions and needs from her church of choice. Everyone is different and that is a good thing :o)

    Answer by Rachael at 1:07 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • i deleted my answer. After rereading it came off pretty arrogant. flatlanderjean is right on with her answer. Our Parish doesn't have a youth group but all of the parishes in our area do have combnined youth group one for high school another for the Jr. High kids.

    Answer by oldermomof5 at 1:16 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • How about waiting until she's old enough to understand before pushing it on her?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:07 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • I don't think you can force her. She seems really young to already be determined to attend another church. I would try to find out what she likes about the other church maybe she has a good reason, just listen to what she has to say.

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 2:45 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • I am Catholic and was raised pretty strictly. I went to a Catholic school for 9 years and had the religion and the Catholic ways crammed down by throat. If I would have been given the freedom to explore other religions, I may be more willing to go to church now and bring my son. DO NOT force her in to attending the Catholic church. Give her the freedom, understanding and choice to chose for herself. She may surprise you and go right back to her Catholic faith. You can NOT forxe a child to believe what they may not, you can NOT force a child to be what they are not. If you keep pushing, she may completely turn from any faith.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 3:15 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

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