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Do I have a case

My son's dad has had custody for almost two years(since 2008) and in that time he has moved five times(changing my son's school each time) He has moved further and further away from me without going to court for permission(although it's still in the same state) his fiance attacked me while I was nine months pregnant. He has kept my son away from me for two months because he refused to follow a modified visitation schedule because HE moved. Not only that but he made 8 times what I made last year and I have way more children in the house and I am being made to pay almost $400 a month in child support.($358 to be exact and I pay $250 because that's what I can afford). Anyway I have police reports from him not showing up, I have emails of him saying I can only talk to my son for thirty minutes on the weekend etc, etc. etc. We go to court in January and I do have a lawyer but I'm nervous. Do I have a case

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:15 PM on Dec. 15, 2009 in Politics & Current Events

Answers (7)
  • I would think that the custody orders are seperate from the child support orders, are they not? One thing should not have an impact on the other. If you have court orders that he is not to move more than a certain amount of miles away from your residense, then you may be able to get him on that. I would hope that you have documented every time he is unwilling to allow visitation, but that would be your efforts (you would have had to try to go get your son and make and issue if your ex isn't willing to abide by the court orders). You have left enough out of the story that there is no real way to know if you have a case or not. The most I would be willing to say is MAYBE. Why does he have custody? Do you have a formal custody and visitation order? I would also suggest that you may be in contempt for not paying the full amount of child support, so keep that in mind.


    Answer by Anonymous at 6:23 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • That really sucks. Was there ever an order that was supposed to keep him within a certain distance from you (standard where I am is 100 miles)? I would make sure you have all of your documentation when you go to court. Maybe check into legal assistance to help you out. The constant moves can't be easy for a school aged child to endure, but I don't know that the court can legally stop him. If you can prove that you have more of a stable home and that he will get the attention he needs then you might have something. Are you still in the area where the double dealing went down?

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:00 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • In general, and without knowing what your custody and child support agreements, I would say there is a case. Most custody agreements state that the child cannot be moved outside X number of miles from the non-custodial parent. If your agreement says this, and your son's father is in violation, you may be able to have him declared in contempt.
    Did you file charges against his fiance for attacking you? I don't really think her actions have any bearing on your custody/child support issues. But if you did not file charges, and you want to, that is your right.
    WIthholding visition for any reason is a violation of visitation agreements. Because he did so, he may be held in contempt.
    As unfair as it may seem, his salary in comparison to yours may not have any bearing on what YOU have to pay for support in accordance with the agreement. The court takes many factors into consideration when deciding what you will pay. Continued.....

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:53 PM on Dec. 15, 2009

  • Continued from Anon 11:53:
    As you know, you will have to have the court modify your supprot agreement.
    Keep up the documenting of events. That will help - your lawyer should have already told you that!
    It's always nerve racking to go to court, especially when children are involved. Just be honest and try not to get overly emotional in front of the judge - in my experience big displays of emotion do not belong in court. Just like any case - it is up to the judge to determine the outcome here. My best advice is to relax and do as your lawyer asks of you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:00 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I have only moved once in all this time and that was from an apartment to a house. Our agreement does not state whether or not he is supposed to be within a certain number of miles. however, we did go to court on his filing of contempt of court and he was told by the judge that he needed to move closer to where I was since I'd not left the county and only moved five minutes away from where I'd lived originally. He then moved again after that further away than he was previously.
    I did file charges against the fiance and filed for an order of protection but since it was a one time thing and she and I are not family and never lived together they threw it out. Unfortunately this attack was done in front of my son

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:15 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • if he broke the agreement and you were attacked showing he is with a violent woman you certainly have a case... can i ask why he has custody in the first place?

    Answer by AmaliaD at 7:48 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • Like I said we are still not too sure. The fact that I was never notified of the case in the first place when we went to court and then his LAWYER committed perjury should have made it a case to be thrown out. at the time I'd moved from where I live now to where I grew up twice. Mainly because he was not paying child support and I needed to be around family while I tried to take care of our son. The judge said it showed "instability". Funny how a year and a half later he's moved more times than I have in the entire time my child's been alive

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:06 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

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