Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I just can't find the happiness

Everyone around me is ecstatic that I'm pregnant. My hubby, his family, my family. But as for me, I can't seem to find the happiness and excitement I should be feeling. I feel like I'm in a funk and I can't get out of it. Anyone else feel this way or just me?

Answer Question

Asked by JrSmOm2005 at 10:19 AM on Dec. 16, 2009 in Pregnancy

Level 4 (44 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • it's called whacked out and wonky hormones. Talk to your ob about it. It's common, dont' feel guilty

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 10:23 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • When I found out I was pregnant with my daughter (my first) I was NOT HAPPY. Everyone around me was so happy for us /me but I just wasn't. eventually I came around, but it took awhile and now she is a wonderful 16 yr old I am SO thankful for her :)

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 10:24 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I felt that way when I was pregnant with my second. Even after I had her, I wished I could just leave her at the hospital and go back to the life I was used to. But I got over it, and now I can't imagine not having her around. This, too, shall pass. :)

    Answer by DragonRiderMD at 10:26 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I felt the same way. It took 6 years for my husand and I to get pregnant and at first I felt nothing. I walked around in a stupper for a whole month, but when I saw the baby on the u/s monitor everything changed. Maybe it is fears, but I guess it has alot to do with as pp said hormones. I hope this is as fleeting as mine was and Good Luck!

    Answer by SandraBeth at 10:27 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • It's hormones. Your feelings may be all over the place during pregnancy and the first month or so after.

    Plan to breastfeed. The hormones of breastfeeding really help. There is prolactin that is called the mothering hormone. Oxytocin, the love hormone. It is the hormone that causes the contractions in the breast that makes the milk come out. Endorphins, the feel great hormones. Mothers that breastfeed have a great hormonal advantage.

    People will say breastfeeding helps bonding. Then other people will say I bonded just fine without breastfeeding. What people aren't understanding is breastfeeding mothers get this hormonal advantage that causes attachment formation. The hormones are also in the milk and go to the baby. It's a symbiotic relationship that benefits both mother and baby.

    Breastfeeding is what made me accept being a mother and be happy. I never wanted to be a mother and thought I was infertile.


    Answer by Gailll at 10:35 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • It's not just your hormones. I felt the same way when i found out I was pregnant. It's a very big change for you & your body & sometimes that is a hard thing to get excited about. It can be more nerve racking than exciting when everything in your life takes a 180 degree turn. I was not excited about being pregnant, but i am so grateful that i was! It was hard but i made it through & have a wonderful beautoful DD to show for all of my effort.


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:29 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • It's not uncommon to feel this way. Especially if you're already under stress. You could talk to your doctor, they might be able to help. When I found out I was pregnant with my first, for the longest time I felt nothing. I wasn't happy or sad. I had litreally no feeling about it for quite a while. Eventually though it sank in and I was very happy. He is the best surprise I've ever gotten. I think that since he wasn't planned and it was a very stressful time in our lives not only financially but we had gotten married almost exactly one month before his conception, that played a big part in what I was feeling.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:33 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I don't think I was thrilled with it until later closer to the time I went into labor when the reality of the new life with my son hit me. When I saw his face and held him is when my happiness came.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:33 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • BTW, you don't have to consider whether or not to breastfeed at this point. Opinions of the advantages of that aside, I don't think this is all hormones. If you're not ready for a pregnancy and one occurs, it's a major shock and you'll need time to adjust.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:36 AM on Dec. 16, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.