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I'm looking for advice more than a straight answer (please read details)

Recently a lot of drama has happened with my family - my cousin, David, and his girlfriend of 8 years, Erica, were living with my aunt and her boyfriend, Luc, of 11 years. Three months ago David found out Erica had cheated on him and he left her, a month ago Luc and Erica began an affair and moved out of my aunt's house a week ago, after Luc emptied the joint accounts and left my aunt with no money so now she'll also be losing the house. Erica has stopped talking to everyone in the family except to talk trash to my aunt. Now Luc has an 8 year old son my aunt has raised since he was a baby and Erica's son is David's son. My daughter is turning 4 soon and I know she wants her cousins at the party, except I don't want the day to be ruined by Erica and Luc attending. Should I invite the boys and try to explain that to keep the peace I'd prefer the boys come with Erica's sister or do I not invite them at all?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:35 PM on Dec. 16, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (5)
  • tough decision... which would be easier/work best you think- explaining to the family you only want the boys there, or explain to your daughter that for whatever reason her cousins wont be able to make it this year? good luck with what you decide though

    Answer by lilianasmom1116 at 3:39 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I'm trying to find a way to keep my kid's happy. We live next door to my aunt and Luc still brings my 5 year old to school in the morning because his son goes to the same school so she knows that Luc and my aunt broke up but she doesn't know that Auntie Erica and Luc are a couple now. My kids are close to their cousins especially my younger daughter and Erica's son because they're only six weeks apart in age. I considered Erica a sister and for her to betray my family like this is painful but I don't want the kids to suffer because of it. Both Erica and Luc treat their kids like pawns and I'm sure by now they feel like they've lost half their family - I can't stand either of them thinking my family has abandoned them which is why I'd like for them to come to the party and I'm not positive Erica's sister will attend, along with her son, if I don't invite Jordan (Erica's son).

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:41 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I would go to the parents and tell them what ever problems or issues they have with eachother or any other person that will be there they need to put the shit behind them and take it up with one another at a different time. That's alot of drama for one family I feel bad for the children.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:42 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • My situation is not quite as drastic but our whole family has been fighting this year and I had to make the choice of having two different parties or just one. I decided I shouldn't be punished nor should my child for the way they act so I had a "children only" party. I put on the invites of the adults I didn't want there "Drop Clara and Zeb off at 4pm. Party ends at 6pm so please arrive at that time to pick them up." I put "Please arrive at 350 and pick up by 550" on the other members invitation. It went fine. It might have been obvious but you know what if they'd act like adults maybe they'd have been able to stay too!

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:27 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I would not want the trash at the party. I would invite the kids and offer to pick them up and drop them off. The whores should not be welcome anywhere only their kids.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:05 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

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