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I am losing control...

My husband thinks its funny to call me things like bitch and lazy ( which I am honestly, neither) and to say he hates me. His whole family is like that, they dont think its a "mean" thing to say it... I dont know why.

My daughter has picked up on it and now she calls me it too..it breaks my heart...

I am starting to hate my husband, he wont give it up, he is also always a grouch, constantly complaining. I talked to him about it before ( many times, even threatned to leave) so now instead of calling me a bitch, he spells it out he is always like..hey b-i-t-c-h ... and so now my 3 year old is also spelling it.

My daughter has basically gone out of control now, and she use to be soo good. She is constantly yelling at me now and calling me those things and saying she hates me...he also has her saying that I am mean to her or that I hurt her ( if someone asks her how, she says cause i put her in time out) * continued*

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:53 PM on Dec. 16, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (18)
  • I basically think it is his fault, when we are not around him she is fine ( or atleast better, than when he is around) ...but I cant even get control....I have yelled and pleaded ( to both) and I have tried time outs, even spanking ( but i dont want to anymore) ..I am out of ideas...how to get her to stop when he wont...

    And I before anyone says it, I cant just leave him... even if I would,I would have to wait to save money and everything, that wont help me right now...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:56 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • Omg I'm in shock right now...Honey u need to leave cuz that is Verbal Abuse! Why do u put up with it?
    TRUNINA

    Answer by TRUNINA at 10:56 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • Your husband should see the result of his actions in your dd and be ashamed. I'd put my foot down and tell him you're starting to hate him. Give him a serious warning. As for your kid, tell her Dad is being horribly disrespectful and she is too and it's a terrible, humiliating, embarrassing example.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:56 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • There is help out there. U should look into it. Maybe u guys should try Family Therapy. Ever thought of that?
    TRUNINA

    Answer by TRUNINA at 10:59 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I have told him ( several times) that I am starting to hate him...he thinks I am joking nad that i dont mean it ( how he thinks him calling me these things are also joking ) ....

    I have also tried reasoning with my daughter and telling her it isnt nice and she hurts mommys feelings...

    i dont know what to do...

    what thank you girls for your advice...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:00 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • family therepy is something i would want to try....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:02 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • Go to a counselor and get some help for your self. Why would you ever stay with a man like this? Talk to your parents, move home, go on a vacation to visit relatives and don't tell him where you are. If he was hitting your child or you would you put up with that too?
    Make a statement that lasts. Make a statement that he can understand. He clearly is not seeing how this is a problem to you. I know you said you don't want to hear the 'move out" but seriously are you waiting to be pregnant with this mans second third of fourth child? Then what do you do? Get some help for your self, and if moving out is not going to help then tell him you need to have some family counseling. You can find it for free or very low rates based on salary. So do it for your self.
    mmmegan38

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 11:07 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • How old is your daughter? U need to speak with her in private so that way she knows how u really feel about that.
    TRUNINA

    Answer by TRUNINA at 11:08 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • I agree with Megan. To save your family your gonna have to make that happen. Therapy will help.
    TRUNINA

    Answer by TRUNINA at 11:10 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

  • Negativeness is contagious. I'd get out but that's just me. I can't be around negative, verbally abusive people. I was in a marriage like that for years. I got out and never regretted it.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:18 PM on Dec. 16, 2009

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