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Are you the type of mom that do spankings when needed but really don't want to deep inside?

This morning I got up to get the kids ready for school (I get them up one hour before and even then they drag butt) they slowly got up and slowly having breakfast I tried to push them to hurry My son the silly one in the morning he just gets on my nerves I usually give them a good spanking after so many times talking to them but today I tried so hard to hold back I don't like to spank only when needed...He just kept on and on I finally got up to spank him but by the time I got to him I barely gave him up he just looked at me like you didn't spank me? I was like I don't want to hurt you...please just get ready so we can go on time to school then I walked away...but he still continued to be silly. Then finally it was time to take them to school.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:11 AM on Dec. 17, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (14)
  • I was a mother who spanked, but I seldom had to. The purpose of spanking is to train and discipline children--it's not for punishment. The goal is to turn out children who are respectful and obedient. You should be able to tell your child one time what you want from him, and it should be happening immediately. He is to respect your authority enough to know that he has no choice but to obey. I spank my grandchildren today if they need it--with the full permission of their parents. They are very respectful and obedient children. The key is consistency and recognition of what your goal is. No good parent enjoys spanking, but that parent knows that what the goal is and that training is necessary for the good of the children as well as for peace in the home. At the age your children are, the struggle will be greater than it would have been had you started when they were toddlers, but it can be done. Get yourself a swatter
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:20 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • This is a very touchy subject. I was "spanked" not "abused" as a child and I truly feel it did the trick, I grew up with strong morals and am very successful both in my personal life and my career. I am pregnant with my first and always thought I would "spank" if really needed. But right now, carrying this tiny baby that is totally defenseless, I just cannot imagine doing anything negative to it. Maybe my outlook will change again when I have a misbehaving booger driving me nuts but for right now, I would rather die then do anything to cause my baby harm.

    DisneyBride13

    Answer by DisneyBride13 at 8:20 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • NannyB...what you wrote is exactly how I felt before becoming an emotional bag of tears with this pregnancy! lol...
    DisneyBride13

    Answer by DisneyBride13 at 8:22 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • Spanking too much and after awhile it becomes uneffective. I only do so when needed. My daughter is a real tester, and tell her not to touch something, she will put her finger on it anyway and look at me as she is doing so. It is funny somewhat, But am teaching her to listen when told to do something without having to spank every time, or a timeout.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:23 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • WELL I LET THEIR DAD DO THE DICEPLIN IF THEY NEED A SPANKING AND I DO MAKE THEM DO TIME OUT TO THINK ABOUT WHAT THEY DID AND WHAT THEY CAN DO THE NEXT TIME THEY HAVE A PROBLEM
    nancy155777

    Answer by nancy155777 at 8:51 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • yup, i'm one of those moms. i def don't spank everyday, and it doen't hurt him, he just knows he's in trouble when i do it.
    angevil53

    Answer by angevil53 at 9:10 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • All of my 5 children are grown now and are productive adults. I am very proud of them. Yes I spanked them, I never enjoyed it. I told them to do something, if they didn't immediately obey I told them again just to be sure they heard me. If I had to tell them the third time I knew they were rebelling and it is then I spanked them. They learned Moma doesn't tolerate rebellion! You are teaching them( your purpose as a parent) to obey. As adults they will have to obey their bosses, laws, social norms, etc. Allowing them to disobey will only make it harder on them trying to live in a society of limits. That is a reallity harder to adjust to than a spanking as a child.
    As a help to insure my sanity those school mornings I turned up every clock in the house 10 minutes. Even the slowpokes got ready on time. Not until they were older did they learn my secret to a calmer morning.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:19 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • I have a 4 month old son, so I haven't had to deal with any of that yet, but I will only use spanking as a "last resort." I think spanking your son almost every morning because he takes too long to get ready for school is harsh and obviously ineffective since he continues to do it. In my opinion, spanking is only effective if its seldom done and only when it is a serious matter that no other punishment is able to correct. To answer your question though, obviously no mother WANTS to spank their child. All of us would love if it we never had to resort to that...but sometimes it needs to be done.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:22 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • I can't spank. I don't think there are many parents who spank who can say they never spank in anger. They may want to teach their kids, but I never forgot the contorted face of my dad coming to get me if he thought I did something wrong- and I wasn't always told what I did. I think if people didn't want to spank their child, they wouldn't. I don't want to and I don't. I'm sure most kids grow up fine, but I didn't. There's a difference between spanking to correct a behavior and spanking when the behavior isn't wrong. You say your kid is acting silly- that's not bad is it? Is he putting himself or others in danger? Is spanking changing his behavior? I think the answer to both is no. When you say you dont' want to spank, I think its saying its time to move on to other consequences. I recently read a book that suggested using silliness back to get them on task. 5-8 is old enough to find other punishments.
    mrs_pulley

    Answer by mrs_pulley at 10:10 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • I have never spanked my children and they have no behavior issues. They are not perfect but much better behaved than my friends kids who are spanked. The key is being consistant. If we say we are going to do something we do it so my kids know everytime they are warned the next step is a consequence. My friends who spank are very inconsistant and their kids know it so they take the 50/50 chance they might get into trouble. Without consistancy a parent should not bother they are not effect at discipline no matter the method.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:16 AM on Dec. 17, 2009

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