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Why is she not talking to me?

I have a question and it seems super silly, but just wondering your opinions. My friend is in England visiting her parents over Christmas. She went over in October and isn't coming back til February. Her hubby is military, so of course he couldn't go, but was suppose to join her and the kids this next weekend over in England. He got either sent TDY or deployed last minute though, so he just told her yesterday morning that he won't be able to come for Christmas. She's really mad at the military now, and says her entire Christmas is ruined because it won't be Christmas without him. I saw her posts on facebook (where we've been chatting almost daily up til yesterday) about her being SO upset that he won't be there and they won't get to go do all her plans she had. So I saw her online 4 TIMES today and sent her a message "Hey how are you doing", "I'm here to chat if you want" and every time she logs off immediately. CONT

 
AprilDJC

Asked by AprilDJC at 4:52 PM on Dec. 17, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 20 (8,524 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • hmmm sounds like you didnt do anything wrong. maybe your perspective isnt really getting her feelings like calm? like lets say she said to you "i cant believe he's not gonna be home for christmas!" and your response was "well i really feel for you, im really sorry" BUT instead her friends are giving her "damn the military!! they should shoot the person who did this"...you know, depends if she lives off of comments that are negative instead of the comforting stuff???
    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 9:13 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • She knows I have loads of plans with the family for Christmas, and its not like I am sending her messages like "guess what I get to do that you don't" or rubbing my Christmas plans in her face or anything. I've not even mentioned anything really, so I don't see why she would be mad at me? I know she's chatting with her other friends who aren't married. Weird. I mean she had to know when she went to England for 5 months that with the military there MIGHT be a chance her hubby may not be allowed to go at Christmas time. I can see being upset, I would be too, but just wondering why she wouldn't be talking to me? I can't even get her to answer me so that I can ask her lol! What do you think? DO I just quit contacting her til she decides to contact me?
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 4:55 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • I wonder if you could've possibly mentioned that her dh might be deployed in a past conversation?! If so then she probably feels like you jinxed her. I would just let her cool off and vent, and wait for her to make the next contact attempt. My sis is having issues with me because my kids might have more gifts than hers and she's talking to my neighbors about it instead of me, so its probably just the time of year too!!!! Don't sweat it!
    ladyd6280

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 5:26 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • If you were talking to her over facebook, it may be facebook! FAcebook chat is always messing up. So don't even take it personally.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:44 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • Oh no lol I never said anything to her about him possibly not going. As far as we all knew he was going to be going there this Sunday. She was saying all this super fun cool stuff they were going to do, how being in England at Christmas time was really awesome and they had all these plans, they were going to go out on datees since her mom and dad would babysit, all that. Then I woke up and got on Facebook yesterday morning, and she had posted "Well now my entire Christmas is ruined" and didn't really want to say what was wrong he she just posted that Shawn wasn't going to be joining her, and obviously she was talking to one of her other friends because her friend replied "well make it the best you can with your kids and parents, hopefully shawn can find someone to celebrate with while he is over there" so he has been sent somewhere unexpectedly but I think now she's mad at me because I get to be with my husband at Christmas.
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 5:45 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • I thought about that too, anon, but I did send her both facebook chat, facebook message, and a post on her wall. She's not responded to any of them.
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 5:45 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • It's true, facebook chat is always screwed up, I hate using it! But she might just not be in the mood to chat, maybe she's jealous or maybe not. I'd wait for her to contact you.
    danielp

    Answer by danielp at 5:59 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • Sounds like the concensus is to wait it out :)
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 6:03 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • She's a spoiled brat who is having a temper tantrum. Leave her alone. I can't believe a married woman is so immature as to act like that.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:13 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • Defintiely the negative, she feeds off that stuff. I'm always the one with the positive comments though so you might be right.
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 11:05 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

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