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Would you move in with family members?

Our family and my husband's brother's family are both barely scraping by. We are considering merging together to cut our bills so to speak by living in the same house. My brother-in-law and his wife have a larger house than we do, even in a better neighborhood. Their mortgage is about the same as ours as well as the other expenses. My SIL is a SAHM and I work full time along with both of the men. Together we have 6 children. We all get along well and I am very flexible when it comes to housekeeping, esp if she is going to mainly do that and taxi kids while I work. Would anyone else consider this?

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adove01

Asked by adove01 at 6:50 PM on Dec. 17, 2009 in Money & Work

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Answers (41)
  • Personally, I like my privacy. I would rather barley scrape buy in my own house.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 6:54 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • NO> sounds like trouble in the making.

    If you both sold your homes and bought a duplex, or something else.

    Im sure there are amazing women who could pull this off.... but Im thinking more than likely she is going to feel like the family's maid, and you are going to end up resenting the time she has with all the kids.... doesnt sound like a good choice.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:55 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • I would never consider living with family. Never.
    JulieJacobKyle

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 6:57 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • For awhile My 3 adult sons, dil, grandson, and I all lived together until we could afford to get places on our own. It was mostly good. I didn't have my own bed. One of my sons worked 11-7 so I slept in that bed while he was gone. Everyone got along but the house was pretty messy all the time.

    If you do it make sure you appreciate what your SAH SIL does as work. It may upset her quick if she is expected to do an unfair amount of childcare or housecare. If she is going to take care of your kids and do housework that you should be doing you should split your check with her. Often it is easier to work outside the home than to be a SAHM.
    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 7:00 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • No! I prefer my privacy also. Its a bag idea.
    MLM0503

    Answer by MLM0503 at 7:00 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • based on what gaill said........ perhaps with the two households combined you could afford a housekeeper once a week. Im sure that would ease the burden all around.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:02 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS!!! You may as well kiss that relation ship goodbye!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:04 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • I would think about it, definitely would have to have house rules down on paper. Who is responsible for what, etc...It may seem ok in the beginning but I know if I was the SAHM I would eventually feel like I was the one doing all the work, child care etc... so I would make sure we were all in agreement on that and then every month sit down and discuss what may need to be changed in the situation.
    Good Luck
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:05 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • The bedroom situation is pretty much solved, Both couples would have their own bedroom, there are 2 girls who would either share one room and have the other as a playroom or have individual rooms and the 4 older children are boys and they would share the finished basement which is climate controlled and huge. Space in the house is not an issue. I understand that my SIL would need help, hell, I need help. But we were going to have an account set up for household expenses that we would put into and on my days off, I was planning to help with whatever is needed, because I know it would be unfair for her to take on all the extra work by herself.
    adove01

    Answer by adove01 at 7:08 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

  • We moved in with my dad during hard times (still here) until we get on our feet. Not bad, but besides him and his wife, there is no one here.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:35 PM on Dec. 17, 2009

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