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Is there hope? someone cheer me up

my babys daddy left me 11 days before xmas no job no money rents due bills are due and he left me for his ex!! i feel like a piece of crap and i realy feel like crying all the time and everything. i use to be a cutter its been almost 2 years since i cut myself and im trying so hard not to!! he wants to see his baby and hes playing good father when my baby is 4 monthes old and hes probbly changed 5 diapers his new gf said my baby is going to call her mommy i realy need someone to give me some hope and cheer me up and tell me everything will be ok!!!

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Asked by Tbaby61727 at 8:49 AM on Dec. 18, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (9)
  • don't do that...take your baby and go stay with a family member or a friend or someone who can comfort you. Dont let the asshole even see your baby unless its court ordered. My son's father kicked me and my son out when he was only 2 wks old in the pouring rain 2 wks before Christmas. I know how you feel...i wanted to die! You have someone else to take care of now, its not just you you have to take good care of yourself inorder to take care of your baby

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:09 AM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • It's ok for you to feel sad but don't feel bad. There is a difference. You need to look at this as a new start. It's your man who is the piece of crap. Do what you have to do to provide for your baby. You need to make a vow to yourself that you won't cut. Think of the fact that they will tell the judge you are an unfit parent if they know you are doing that. You can and will survive this and come out a better person and mother. You can go to school on grants and you can get a job. Yes even with a baby. Do you have anyfamily or friends who will support your decisions and maybe help you out. This will be a tough time but you can be strong and get through it. You are very young and you have plenty of time to get your life rolling in the direction YOU want. Meet your challenges and conquer them. You will be a happy and pround mama with every met challenge.
    Don't stoop to their level. Be mature, There is hope!

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 9:12 AM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • Of course there is hope. Don't go cutting yourself because that is selfish & immature. You have a baby that needs you to be strong. You had the baby, now that is your first priority. Do you not have ANY family that can help you?

    If you never married thsi guy, don't worry about your child calling her mommy. The fact that you never married makes a big difference because YOU are have SOLE CUSTODY & you have all the right to limit the amount of time your child spends there. I think your child is way too young to be spending time over there anyway. At this age, babies need their mommies & nothing else.

    Things will be OK eventually, all things must pass (as George Harrison says). You will not feel this way forever. Just keep telling yourself that this will pass & you will grow from the experience. Just let him go & allow you heart to mend itself.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:12 AM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • yes i agree go stay with family for a while and let him get a court order to see baby. i ahte thtat bitch to, i wouldnt want my baby calling anyone mommy but me.think about ur little baby.dont cut urself,if u do they will probaly send u away to get help and what would happen to ur baby

    Answer by angelairelan at 9:14 AM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • There is always hope for a better life, a better tomorrow than today. The first step is in letting go of the past because you can't change anything about what has already happened. The essence of hope is in knowing that you can start again today, that you can learn from the bad choices you have made in the past, and that you can choose to never repeat them in the future. The greatest hope comes to those who are willing to learn from their pasts and are willing to go in a different direction. There is much strength in learning to find your worth as a person apart from those who only want to use you up for their own pleasure. So know that you are a person of great value and look for relationships that will accept and appreciate your worth. Refuse to ever again settle for those who don't. Think about what you want out of life and then begin to work toward achieving it. That's the stuff happiness is made of; you can do it.

    Answer by NannyB. at 9:26 AM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • Don't allow his girlfriend to be called "Mommy". He's a douche bag and doesn't deserve to see his child. However, he does have rights to do so. You need to look up at your local government's website for assitance programs. Hopefully you have family members that can help you out.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 12:07 PM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • Aw honey, I'm sorry you are going through this. I've been there where all I did was cry, just felt so sad all the time. Well have a good cry, or two or three, get it out of your system, let yourself cry. Then dry off your face and stand up straight and tall because it will get better! Don't listen to the things his gf says, just blow it off like it was never said. Your baby will know who it's mommy is, I worried about the same thing when my kids were little, but they are all grown up now and they all live within 5 minutes of my house. Their dad lives in another state and they know who and what he really is. It takes time to get better, it won't happen over night, but I promise that if you just stay strong and focus on you and your baby, that each day, a little at a time, it will get better. Then before you know it, a year has gone by, another year, your life changes, new people come into your life, and all that (cont)

    Answer by TarLion at 5:25 PM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • bad stuff is left far far behind you. I'm living proof of that. Also, please please please do not cut yourself. I am not a cutter but I have been self destructive in the past, and it's because your self esteem is low right now and you don't think you deserve to be happy. That's not true!! You deserve the best life has to offer you and so does your baby. You can do this!! It will get better!

    Answer by TarLion at 5:28 PM on Dec. 18, 2009

  • NannyB - that's some good advice there!

    Answer by TarLion at 5:30 PM on Dec. 18, 2009

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