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is 4 months too young for my baby to have over night visits with his dad?

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:33 PM on Dec. 19, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (7)
  • I think 4 years is too young. Now you may have to do whatever a judge tells you to do. If you are breastfeeding you may be able to wait until a baby is older for overnight visits.

    I was divorced when my kids were 2 and 5. Their dad took them out to eat on Wed. and could have them any time he wanted on the weekend. He usually just had them a few hours. When the youngest one was almost 5 they started spending Friday night. We moved so we lived about an hour apart when the youngest was almost 8 and that's when they started doing every other weekend. It worked well for everyone. They never spent summers. This was in the 1980s and 1990s.

    Answer by Gailll at 4:41 PM on Dec. 19, 2009

  • I don't think there is a age requirement, the question is... Can dad handle a 4 month old? Does he know how to handle, feed, and care for a baby?

    If this is his first child and he has never really handled a baby, I would say no. But if he has been around the baby alot and knows how to care for it, I see nothing wrong with dad having the baby over night, it is his child too. But like I said it really depends on dads' experience with an infant. Can you trust him?

    Answer by midnightmoma at 4:44 PM on Dec. 19, 2009

  • No reason a 4 month old cannot go for an overnight. Most parents are just unwilling to let their child go that early. But if you are on formula or can pump a some bottles to cover the night, I don't see why not. Daddy is just as capable of taking care of baby as you are in most cases.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:47 PM on Dec. 19, 2009

  • It's not 'too young' if you and dad are both ready. I dunno why everyone is questioning Dad's ability. If he is a first time dad and you are a first time mom you are in the same boat except you have had 4 months practice. Write down your baby's routines and have you phone handy. Let Dad know you want him to call with question and you will not question his abilities of being a father for asking.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:48 PM on Dec. 19, 2009

  • If you were married would you ask that?? HE IS the father.... right. I think he should be able to have an over night visit with his own child unless there is a breast feeding issue.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:09 PM on Dec. 19, 2009

  • if your breastfeeding baby wont just take a bottle just like that even if it is filled with wonderful milk! i would wait!

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:44 PM on Dec. 19, 2009

  • In some states, overnight visits aren't granted through the courts until after a year or two. Very young babies and children need security and continuity. If you are breastfeeding, it can really screw with that as well... Dad can get plenty of time with baby during the day... there's just no reason for overnight visits... what, is he gunna watch him sleep?

    Really though, it's up to you. If me and DH were separated, I wouldn't even be able to leave our 9 month old with him. He just can't handle babies... figure out what feels right for you, ask dad what feels right for him and come to an agreement.

    Answer by LeanneC at 8:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2009

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