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why are so many people so judgemental and malicious toward other moms?

when a mom asks a seriouse serious it regaurds their childrens safety......why do so many moms respond with "your just trying to get attention"? why not give real advice? isnt that what CM is for?

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:33 PM on Dec. 21, 2009 in About CafeMom

Answers (16)
  • tis the be grumpy. it happens. just ignore it

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:35 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • One lady told me my son was a smart ass . I disputed the answer and cm turned a deaf ear. I then answered you're a dumb ass and then told cafe mom and guess what they took my answer off and kept the answer directed toward my minor son on. Good going cm . You get the cm admin award for that one!! But it gets vicious at times and then people get turned off and drop out. Gee I wonder why.Be more fair with the reporting of the answers and women won't drop out

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:37 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • Because people in general suck. Welcome to CafeMom :)

    Answer by sgtdemanda at 2:39 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • Honestly, I think it's because all moms have some insecurities about whether we are doing a good job raising our kids. Most moms wouldn't admit that, but I know I second guess my every move sometimes because I love dd so much and I want to know that I did all I could to give her a good childhood and a good start in life. That is a lot of pressure, and some moms feel the need to put other's down because it helps them feel superior in their parenting skills. I'm sure there are different underlying reasons...they feel insecure about a decision they've made, they get bashed by those in their lives so they feel the need to go on a tirade toward moms online to make up for it...which then puts their victims on the defensive, so they start doing that too and on and on. I say we all just do our best and call it a day!

    Answer by ErinHill226 at 2:43 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • BEcause some people are just trying to get attention and they arent asking for advice. The only posts I see "your just trying to get attention" are the ones that are just for the drama.

    Answer by Mrs.Owen86 at 2:44 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • No, its because some women don't believe or don't want to believe men are like that!!!! Some women want to put blame on other women for the problems they are going through instead of seeing what a man truly is(not all men, but the abusive ones). Perhaps she's one of the ignorant ones that doesn't believe men hit either because she's never experienced it or because she's in denial of her situation! What kills me is how women who haven't been through can judge the situation! I hope that mother can brush that comment off and keep on getting the support she needs! And I do not care how much you love a man if he hits or cheats it will never be enough to change them! Leopards do not change their spots! And if the behavior continues for years there is absolutely no hope for change unless he is willing to be a man at look at himself and admit all the wrong he has done and is genuinely remorseful, tears are not enough, proofs in pdng

    Answer by ladyd6280 at 2:45 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • Sometimes it is become women are totally insecure and have to be right. Other times to put it bluntly they are just bitches who think they are always right. And some are just drama queens who can't stand to have a post without starting some type of drama. I always thought this site was for women to help each other too but after a few bad experiences I refuse to post in the Newcomers Group, that seems to be the worst of all, they bash everyone. There are really good groups you can join on here where the bashing doesn't generally go on or if it does the owner kicks them out. Maybe try to find one of those.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:49 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • i agree with erinhill and ladyd. i always second guess myself whenever i do something with my son. i think the moms that worry and don't think they are perfect are the ones who are good mothers. because no mother is perfect. i can't stand when some of the ladies on here will judge your situation without even knowing you. or they will judge and be rude even though they haven't been in a bad situation so they have no idea what you are going through. just brush off the rude women because they are plenty of good ladies on here.

    Answer by xavierlogan09 at 2:50 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • I wish I knew. I hate when I answer something and then someone has something snarky to say about my answer. When I get snarky back they report me. If you attack me I will attack back, but I go for the throat. Don't dish it out if you can't handle it. I will never understand why people try to feed you shit when they know it doesn't taste well.

    My grandma always said "when you hang with the big dogs, ya gotta bark."

    Answer by momtotrips at 2:57 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

  • Honestly I posted a question and I emailed the woman who decided to be disrespectful and tell her she needed to post comments a little more wisley next time. But we are all moms with children who have different questions about things and we come here to talk about it with other moms. But other moms think they are perfect and if you dont do things their way the have to judge.

    Danielle Shellhorn

    Answer by ddsunshine at 2:59 PM on Dec. 21, 2009

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