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molesting

when is it molesting and when is it child curiosity..
ok no i am not dumb, i know this kid is molesting my son but i dont know what to do, he is 10 (my husbands brother) and my son is 4. my son starting telling me "_ touched my pee" when he was 2 and i told my husband. my husband talked to _ and he said no he doesnt. well i kept my son away from him for a long time but now that my son got a little older i thought it would be ok for him to go over his grandma's house and play with all the kids. well now my son is 4 and he is telling me that _touched his pee pee. i totally beleive him and i want to kill that kid. but my husand said _ must be getting these tendencies from somewhere so he is going to sit down and calmly talk to _ to see what is really going on, to see who is teaching him this stuff. the reason why i asked, when is it just child curiousity is becuase i remember being young and kissing my girl cousins BUT..

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:08 AM on Dec. 23, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (22)
  • i always had a fear that maybe i was molested because i was very sexual as a young child.. but i dont have any memory of being molested
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:09 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • also, we think _(my husbands brother) might be being molested by someone else and in turn molesting my son
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:11 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • OP - that is a very real possibility. I wouldn't jump to the kid is just sick of something... he may just be acting on something that has happened (or continues to happen) to him. That is the step I would take, to figure out the root.
    RutterMama

    Answer by RutterMama at 10:16 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • Kids learn that type of behavior from somewhere, no this is NOT a case of simple childhood curiosity & you need to not let your son around this kid alone ever again!!!! Hubby should sit the cousin down & talk to him about what's going on but if he's being molested he's gonna lie. Watch for signs of guilt & shame that are not in relation to or are more then what you expected. Watch how he acts around others & see who he shys away from, more than likely your perp. You've put your finger on something here, trust your mommy instincts & protect your son.
    Nyx7

    Answer by Nyx7 at 10:16 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • the first two answers are me still talking about the situation.. i am the OP and the first two answers are me also..
    yes, Ruttermama, we are thinking my husbands brother is being molested by someone else and we are going to pursue that course.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:18 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • at 10 you know right from wrong ... regardless of the situation someone needs to tell your husband's mother what might be occurring and if it is true your husband's brother need therapy. I would NOT let me son around him until the situation was figured out!
    kaylan010

    Answer by kaylan010 at 10:19 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • nyx7, yes i am going with my instincts on this one, i vowed to never let my child be molested and i feel like i have failed him as a parent. i feel like i dont deserve to live
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:20 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • kaylan010, yes you are right my husband said the same thing, he is going to talk to his mother but we fear she wont take us seriously. but i will not let my son around him anymore
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:21 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • Guilt over the situation isn't going to help you. Realize that this is very common 1 in 3 girls & 1 in 6 boys & that's underreported are molested. Most of the time it is by a family member or close friend. As far as traumatic events go, this is going to be something your son needs to work out in therapy but won't scar him for life like the story on my news last night about a 9 yr old boy who was playing in the park w/ his 7 yr old sister when a man w/ a gun snatched him, & raped him in a portapotty while his sister stood outside & listened (I live in FL, the state God Damned). Get him to a counselor & watch more closely in the future. He still needs his mommy around!!! You should also talk to someone about these feelings you're having, don't let this one event destroy your lives & happiness!!! Hang in there mamma!!!
    Nyx7

    Answer by Nyx7 at 10:26 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • Hey, you have to keep your son away, and talk to the boy. This is when it starts.
    A 10 yr old, if taught should no not to touch a child or anyone. I would talk to him with your husband there, & tell him, it is unexceptable, maybe he too is being molested-you need to get.

    My cousin was trying that with me when we were 13, I didn't realize it was molestation, until he tried it with his neice at 13 and he was 22. I have not seen him since, I hope he is not hurting anyone else, but I can't get in contact with him.

    His neices father almost killed him, he flipped out on him. That was the last I spoke to him except at a funeral, then he was married, and has a daughter, at his brothers funeral he told me, I gave him my number but he never called me. He knows I would have messed up his Life.

    He is a pig, and I wish i knew where he was. He is probably saying he has no family, and so on. But it is all lie
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 10:30 AM on Dec. 23, 2009

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