Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

when johnny comes marching home...

my neighbors dh came home on leave this week.usually he comes home and there is a different air.everything is lighter. he seems to be complying to her this week,i think he also believes i am watching her.he is in intelligence,so he does all this stupid stuff to make me think they are not home.he has never done this before.she will park behind the house so i cant see the she goes out and doesnt leave any lights on because i cant tell when the car is there or not.i really dont care i am am used to this crap but usually he doesnt fall for this.he even told my dh that she was lying about us.i dont know what to do..i just feel bad that he feels as if he has to conform.they dont even live together he lives in a whole other dh says he wants to have sex so he will do anything she says while hes on leave. my question is then why doesnt she live with him???

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:52 PM on Dec. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I got along with my x a whole lot better when we didn't live together. We finally did divorce but we stayed together for years bc we didn't live together. We liked being married but just couldn't get along when we lived under the same roof.

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:01 PM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • ya i can really see that...why did you finally divorce if you dont mind me asking?

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:12 PM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • I don't really understand the situation.
    Why do you care if your neighbors pretend to not be home?
    I'm not bashing, just trying to understand the situation better.

    Answer by Laila-May at 6:18 PM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • Doesn't make any sense to me either on why she'd care if you knew she was home or not.
    If my friend/daughter/spouse told me they felt like someone was spying on them or something and I worked in intellegence, maybe I'd be wondering if that person did too and was up to something... not sure

    She told you she does all of these things? And he did?
    Maybe you have a very good imagination as to why they're doing any of these things? I'm not getting the whole conform thing..
    And furthermore, if someone was working in intellegence... would they really tell you that? I kinda thought that they'd lie about what they did to keep them and their families safer?

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 9:13 PM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • Uh I don't get it. Whats the big deal if they want it to appear that they are not home. They probably want to be left alone and if they turn on the lights people will see it as a opportunity to come knocking and they would like some alone time instead. I think your imagination is a little out there, let them be.

    Answer by pnwmom at 3:57 AM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • Who cares why she doesnt live with him? Maybe she doesnt want to. Maybe he doesnt want her to. Maybe the way they do things works for them. Obviously the time that he is there she wants to spend with him without being bothered or she wouldn't worry about people knowing if she was home or not. Your best bet would be to find other friends or something else to do while he is with her because you obviously have wayyyyyy too much time on your hands if you are obsessing over this that much.

    Answer by RamGrl at 1:35 AM on Dec. 27, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.