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I am worried my family will treat my child as an outcast or a charity case just because they dont like the father. I mean isnt it wrong to dislike an innocent child because of the father? Already I feel like a charity case myself by them since me and him are broken up.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:29 PM on Dec. 23, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (3)
  • Maybe your family is trying to help you out, not treat you like an outcast. If they are treating you and your child as outcasts, then you need to talk to them. You need to make sure that NO ONE says anything mean about your child's father, your child is a part of him. Like it or not. My family and I can NOT stand my sons father, but we don't say anything bad about him in front of my child.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:02 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • Are you sure that they are treating you like a charity case? Maybe they're just trying to take care of you when they feel you need some help? Definitely it's wrong to dislike a child or treat them badly because of their parents. Children are innocent. Have you talked to your family members? When is your baby due? Will the father be part of the baby's life? Talk to your family, let them know that you love them, and understand how they feel about the dad, and that because of that your baby is going to need to feel loved by all of them. Hopefully, if you can talk to them they'll be able to actually be there for you and your child in a supportive, loving way, and not in a condescending, "you're not good enough" way. Do a little soul searching as well, and make sure that you're not just feeling insecure because of your situation. I'm sure your family loves you, and will love your baby as well. Good luck! message me if you want...

    Answer by ohwrite at 11:34 PM on Dec. 23, 2009

  • There is nothing wrong with accepting help when you need it. Many people have been "charity cases" at one time in their lives and because of their gratitude for receiving help, many of them have gone on to become very charitable and philanthropic people. So if you are receiving help from others, please be appreciative and not take advantage of it. Pull yourself up and pass along the good that was shown to you to others.

    Please talk to your family and ask them not to say disparaging things to your son about his dad. And you should not say bad things about him either. That is not to say that you have to lie to him that his dad is great either. In time, your child will learn on his own that his dad is a deadbeat.


    Answer by donzgurl at 12:50 PM on Dec. 24, 2009