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how could anyone love

Me when I hate myself? I hate everything about me. I hate my parenting style, my looks, my hygene, the fact that sex is a total turn off right now, that I'm lazy, and just so much more. I keep waiting for dh to leave me yet for some reason unknown to me he stays.

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mom06and09

Asked by mom06and09 at 2:27 PM on Dec. 24, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • If you hate everything about yourself why the hell don't you change? If you hate your parenting style (not sure what that means.. but it can't be good) then change it. If you hate your hygene.. start taking baths! If you hate that your lazy get your ass up! I mean shit, it's not rocket science. If you hate everything in your life CHANGE IT. But no one is going to do that but you.
    daddysgrl718

    Answer by daddysgrl718 at 2:32 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • You really need to increase your self-esteem. I would be happy to give you some life coaching if you'd like. p.s. I don't charge anything for life coaching.
    lowencope

    Answer by lowencope at 2:32 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • Are you suffering from depression. Also I do somewhat agree with the first poster, most of that you can change yourself.
    gulfcoastmom4

    Answer by gulfcoastmom4 at 2:51 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • because he loves you for the person you become and he needs more of a reason to leave you, not those reasons
    americansugar80

    Answer by americansugar80 at 2:53 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • true depression may be an issue
    snoober_k

    Answer by snoober_k at 2:59 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • and daddysgrl718, you should have considered that before answering. people with depression cannot just "get off their ass" to fix these things.
    snoober_k

    Answer by snoober_k at 3:00 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • Sounds like depression to me too. Please see a professional about it before things get too bad.

    Take care
    donzgurl

    Answer by donzgurl at 3:12 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • Forgive me for sounding harsh, but stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it. If you hate yourself, figure out why. Which may involve counceling and medication. If you don't like the way you look, do something about it. If you don't like that you're lazy, then quit being lazy and DO SOMETHING. Take charge of your life rather then letting life happen. It's up to you to make those changes and feel better about who you are. Clearly your husband loves you deeply and accepts who you are, maybe talk with him about WHY he loves you. But sitting there feeling sorry for yourself will not make anything better.

    Snoober - I have depression, and I do take meds for it......as well as anxiety. Sometimes it is just as simple as grabbing the bull by the horns and doing something............anything. The drive needs to be stronger. With therapy or even positive affirmations, that can happen.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 3:31 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • I tell my adult children that when they hate something that bad then make a change. Even a small change will have a trickle effect and you can see a difference. Many times it's something as simple as changing our attitude. See things through positive eyes and not negative. Maybe that will help. Find the good and focus on that until you can find more good things. Until you can manage that just know that your bold outlook is a positive in itself and that is a good place to start. I'm sure there are many things to love about you. It's time for you to find them. You might like what you find. Take some time for you.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:33 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

  • Oh momma I feel you there. You need to get in to see your family doctor for a check up and talk to them about how you feel. It isn't nice feeling that bad about yourself all the time, and trust me when I say it isn't normal or okay either. Something is off balance in your chemistry and your doctor can help to figure out what to do to fix it. You will feel so much better. You deserve to feel better! Good luck!
    sgtdemanda

    Answer by sgtdemanda at 5:45 PM on Dec. 24, 2009

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