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What would you do??

My SO and I moved to TX about a year and a half ago. It's nice here and it's cheaper than other places we have lived. My issue is my family isn't here. My grandmother always has Christmas at her house every year. All of my family celebrates birthdays together. And just basic family bonding. My SO moved to TX because he used to live in Houston with his ex wife and daughter, we live in Dallas which is like 4-6 hours away. We moved here because he wanted to be closer to his daughter, who he hasn't seen in almost 5 years because his ex was that much of a bitch. He hasn't done much to try and see his daughter yet, he says he has a lawyer who is building up a case so he can get visitation rights. But again he hasn't done much about it. When we got to TX I found out I was pregnant..this is my first child...my SO's second. I didn't have very many dreams growing up, but I did have one dream of having a family one day. Cont....

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on Dec. 25, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Cont.... Getting him to want to marry me is like pulling teeth. We have been together 4 years long enough to move past his previous marriage. We also just celebrated my son's 1 st birthday and Christmas and we are alone, because we have no family or friends here in TX. My SO doesn't seem to mind it much, but I want that family bonding with my family around times like this. I'm getting home sick with each passing day. I don't want to live in TX anymore. He has already made it quite clear he wants to stay. If it was just me I would pack my things and move back in heartbeat. But there is my son to consider. My SO and our son have such a great relationship that I don't want to mess that up. So do I sacrifice my happiness for the men in my life or do I gather what sanity I have left and move on.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:18 PM on Dec. 25, 2009

  • OP here sorry if this doesn't make much sense. But this is how confused my brain is..lol
    Cappy1979

    Answer by Cappy1979 at 3:19 PM on Dec. 25, 2009

  • Sometimes we have to make our own new bonds and holiday traditions. You are having another child so that is building the family. Make friends and invite them to your home for the holidays or save and travel home for the holidays in the future. I'd tell him though that if he doesn't want to consider marriage and making a family with a committment that you will consider leaving. Your feelings should matter. He needs to either make you his partner in life or let you find your true happiness. Your son will adapt if you move away.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:31 PM on Dec. 25, 2009

  • Gee I'm living the same life and I feel like I made my bed and I will try to live with it, but if you feel you can move out and move on go for it while the going is good!
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 3:55 PM on Dec. 25, 2009

  • we were in the military for 20-years and had to learn to how to make our own holiday traditions, I have twins, boy and a girl (27-years old). Now we love just being together in our little group.

    But for you it sounds like you should have not gotten married? if you have to force someone to say yes than they did not want to marry!!
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 3:56 PM on Dec. 25, 2009

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