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Taking a child out of state?Okay.

So I know this is going to sound like a stupid question but maybe I just want reassurance. My son lives with me. My husband (NOT together anymore for 3 years) Eric and I are not on good terms. I want to go out of state for 4 days in January to see my family. Eric and I are about to start divorce and custody in April hopefully. Is it illegal to bring your child out of state just for a vacation when the two parents are split up? He takes our son out of state all the time and this will be my first. I am just scared he could try to pull a she stole my son ordeal on me while I am gone. I already called him yesterday to inform him. I live in Louisiana, and I called child protection and they told me that police dont usually get involved with child custody battles. But I dont know If he will try to lie and say I stole him. Pretty much what are my rights as mom? And could they investigate for me so I can prove I told him?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:16 AM on Dec. 27, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (10)
  • Continued from ^ and ask my family (who I am going to see out of state) if I was just visiting? I mean, when you look at it, I am renting an apartment so I would not be dumb enough to leave before my lease is broken, all my stuff will still be at the house and it would be a family trip (my fiance', both my kids and I). I guess I dont want unnecessary drama. What do you think? Thank you very much for taking the time out to read this for me. <3 Oh and to be clear, my fiance and I are stable living together for two years now and getting married right after the divorce so he cant pull we are unstable stuff.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:18 AM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • Sounds as if you are over thinking. If your son lives with you and not his father, than his father does not have any grounds to say you stole your son.
    Do you have legal custody papers?
    PrttyMstng

    Answer by PrttyMstng at 8:27 AM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • No I dont. We have not yet stepped foot in a court yet. I think I maybe thinking too much. Guess I am just a chicken lol.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:36 AM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • don't worry about it, even if the cops are going to investigate it they won't take your kid. You have custody of your son no matter what divorce proceedings you may be lacking. Sounds like you've covered your ass as much as possible, whenever possible put things in writing vs telling him, that way you have tangible proof for court. Shoot him an email before you go, can't say he didn't know!!! Also keep a journal of when he takes him out of state, anything else you are going to need for your divorce.
    Nyx7

    Answer by Nyx7 at 8:46 AM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • Go to www.womenslaw.org and click on KNOW THE LAWS and look up your state. See if gives you that info. If not, call a domestic violence shelter. I know you are in that situation but they usually know things like that bc a lot of ladies have to leave the state with their children. In my state (FL) you just have to tell the dad you are taking the child. You don't need permission but he has to know you are going. I don't personally know about Louisiana. You could also call a family law attorney and just ask. There are legal sites out there like www.avvo.com ( 2 v's not a w). You are right in asking so you don't give him anything to fight you with in court.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:55 AM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • Why don't you get approval in writing from your soon to be EX DH?

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:07 AM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • You can take your child out of state for a vacation and there is nothing your ex can do about it. As always, check with your attorney to get the most accurate information for your state. I am in Wisconsin and I can take my son out of state without my ex's consent for up to 30 days. There is a difference between going on a vacation and moving. I would say that you are overthinking this.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 12:02 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • I would call family court for your county, every state has different laws regarding custody issues. IF your ex-DH says there is no problem then you should be fine, but you are right to make sure it is legally okay.
    goaliemom93

    Answer by goaliemom93 at 1:27 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • u both have joint custody, at this point either one of u could take the child. just ask him and if possible get his response in a email
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:44 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • my kids daddy are spending the holidays in mexico he had me sign a notarized letter staiting i gave permision for him to take them out the country from this date till this date we do it every year just as a precoution
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:12 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

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