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How do I go about this without giving off the wrong impression? HELP!

okay, my best friend had her son in november, and these things have been happening.,

1. she prepares his bottles for the night before bed, and just keeps them in her room, so she doesn't have to go in the kitchen to warm them up, she is aware that the formula expires after two hours of not being in the refridgerator.

2. she wrap up her child WAY too tight. i tried to tell her the other day that he looked uncomfortable and that she should let him stretch out his legs and move around since he is going to be becoming more active soon, but i don't think she understood exactly what i was trying to say.

lastly, they're really isn't any interaction going on between her and her son. she just feeds him and puts him down in a swing. i know this because we see eachother everyday. we live very close to eachother.

i've been getting hints from her bf to talk to her, but i don't want to say the wrong thing.

what to do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:49 PM on Dec. 27, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • She'll be fine. My family always kept bottles at room temp and no one got ill. Swaddling is ok too. Let her learn on her own. You can suggest but it's her child and you have to respect her ways.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:53 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • What about giving her a book as a gift? Something that talks about the stages children go through at this age, the what to expect books are great. That way it doesnt come off as you attacking her or judging her.

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 2:55 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • If he is in a swing that means he isn't wrapped too tight all the time. You don't say that he cries. Some babies do well wrapped tight and that doesn't sound too bad to me.

    Lack of interaction is bad. However, the baby will be ok as long as people are interacting. If you, the baby's father, and other people are interacting then that will help. It isn't ideal but it's not like she is a single mother isolated with no one else involved.

    I am concerned about the formula. Get her a cooler and some ice packs to put the bottles in at night or a mini fridge. The formula does not have to be warmed but it does need to be kept cool. If she is using powdered formula it is not sterile and it can contain bacteria that can kill babies. Any formula that is put into bottles needs to be kept cool but powdered formula is the worst. If she thinks it needs warmed get some kind of bottle warmer she can put by her bed.

    Answer by Gailll at 2:57 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • As far as the formula situation goes, what I do(which you could suggest) is to keep the container of formula beside the bed with bottles containing water and then mix them up as needed. It saves going to the kitchen and doesn't result in bottle rot.

    Answer by Laila-May at 3:01 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • im the person that posted the question.
    he does cry whenever he's wrapped up. im not stupid, i can tell the child is uncomfortable. once you unwrap him he stops crying.

    She has a book already, i don't know whether or not she reads it.

    She mainly comes to me for advice, but i don't want to just bombard her with all of the things that im concerned about and it starts an argument.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:10 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

  • I agree with putting the water in bottles and then having the formula right next to the bed. They even sell the individual packets.

    Answer by mom06and09 at 7:47 PM on Dec. 27, 2009

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