Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My boyfriend of 5 years has been cheating on me for at least a year and a half. We have a 5 month old son who he dearly loves. Should I give him another chance for our son?

He says he wants to make it work, that he just got lost along the way. He says he doesn't want to lose his family and will do whatever it takes to make us ok. I believe he means it now....but I doubt it'll last. He loves our son and spends every sec he's home with him. Idk what to do. I don't think he has killed all love I had for him....but I don't know what to do! I don't want to work it out, but I don't want ds to live in 2 different homes. He does love his son so much and is sooo good with him. Do I look out for me, or my son?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:58 AM on Dec. 28, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (26)
  • Simple: The childs father is not only being crappy to you but to the child by treating the mother as such.

    Answer by ronjwake at 1:03 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • a year and a half is a long time it took alot of thought and work on his part ot keep that going, i dont see how he was lost. it really boils down to is this the life you want to lead?

    never stay for the sake of the child because in the end the child is the one who ends up paying the price.

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 1:04 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • a year and a half??? leave him, he is clearly not in love with you and will just continue to cheat. Your son is too young to know the difference anyway. Better to do it now than a few years from now when he'll start wondering why daddy doesn't live there.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • Leave him he cheated for a whole year and a half. What happen the girl or girls wanted to end the sexing. Did they threatening to tell u and he just wanted to tell u before she did. Leave now if u let him get away with it he will do it again.

    Answer by officerdouglas at 1:37 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • I am sorry, but you are wrong. He is not a good dad. His actions prove that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:43 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • I just know if I leave him, he will get back with her. I don't want that trash around my son. I found out because he left a sex letter he as writting to her up on the comp to go feed the baby and I jumped on it to do something. That's how I found everything out. She knew all about me, she didn't care. She doesn't care about my son. I know if im still here, she won't be. I don't want her in my sons life. Im just so lost.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:03 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • my sisters always stayed becouse of the kids and it made it worse. i wouldnt stay with him if u want to give it an other try,make him wait it out.tell him u need space. if he cheated once he will do it again.i know my sister would have her baby dad stay the night every once in a while(he would sleep on the coutch,they didnt do anything)so he could spend time with his kids

    Answer by angelairelan at 2:22 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • Don't blame the other woman....blame BOTH of them. HE knew he had you at home and he knew you were pregnant. If you consider her to be trash, I hate to tell you but he's trash right along side her because he cheated on you and on his child. Let her have him, it'll just be a matter of time before he cheats on her. Karma's a bitch and it will bite her in the butt one day. Let him go. Once cheater not always a cheater....once. He didn't cheat just once. He cheated over and over, same woman but every time he was with her he cheated. That's 1 1/2 YEARS of cheating. He won't change.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:06 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • he is only sorry that he got caught! only you can decide to stay or leave but let me give you my opinion, it is going to be very difficult to forgive and forget. Don't allow your child to grow up witnessing arguments and recentment. If this guy is truly a great dad, than he should continue to spend quality time with him, but in his own home. Give yourself a second chance and don't make yourself miserable.

    Answer by alejandra559 at 3:58 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

  • Leave him. He didn't have to "go along with it", and he's a grown man.. he should know how to keep his junk in his pants.

    Answer by Pandapanda at 4:15 AM on Dec. 28, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.