When I was 8 weeks pregnant with my first DD things quickly fell apart with her sperm donor and family. 4 months after her birth I met a great man who is now my DH. My DD knows him as dad, the other guy is out of the picture and has been since I was 13 weeks pregnant. Lately I feel bad for his mom. I know as a mom, I would want to see pics of my grandchild. My DH considers my dd his in every way shape and form. He even talks about my pregnancy as if he was there. I don't want the mom or guy in our lives and we now live 1600 miles away from them.
I have her email address. I want to know if I should just send her a pic and a quick update. It has been 6 years. I dont want to open old wounds, or make them think twice about being involved in her life. Not sure what to do!!
Asked by Anonymous at 1:03 AM on Dec. 28, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)
Let it go. Don't start something that you may later regret.
Answer by legalmommy101 at 1:07 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 1:30 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 1:37 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Why would you feel for a child not knowing a family that has had nothing to do with her? Seriously anon, get a grip.
Answer by legalmommy101 at 1:39 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Answer by always_chris at 2:00 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Answer by Roadfamily6now at 3:47 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
I am a mom through adoption and I have worked with many children who are adoptees. One thing I am most concerned about in your post is your daughter. Adoptees need to know, as soon as possible, about their biological parents. Yes, her dad is her dad in every way - accept one. She needs to know that. Talk to your husband and together figure out a way to tell your daughter, and soon, about her family history. Finding out later her life was not what was told to her could be very devastating. Most adoptees know from birth on so you have some catching up to do. Then provide your daughter with age appropriate information about her family, the things that you know. It isn't about her biological father's family and their feelings. It is about what is best for your child. When she is older and ready to have a relationship of her own with them she can. Until then give her what is her's - her history.
Answer by frogdawg at 6:02 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Answer by truealaskanmom at 6:26 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Answer by Shy_Dia at 7:37 AM on Dec. 28, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 9:40 AM on Dec. 28, 2009