I lived with my mom and step-dad for almost 15 years. He beat her and was an alcoholic. I think my mom was a fuctional alcoholic. For years, I thought she was a domestice abuse survivor.........when I had my own kids I began to see things differently. She could have left, and did, but always to retrun. I get the cycle of it all, but I cannot look past my mom being responsible for our life too. What is your opnion? There are tons of details I'm leaving out due to space and time, but isn't the mom responsible to protect the kids regardless of her own mess? I find myself really conflicted with this now, years later.Answer Question
Answer by Anonymous at 3:07 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Answer by kimigogo at 3:08 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 3:09 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Answer by ObbyDobbie at 3:09 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Answer by worriedmommy600 at 3:09 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Answer by tntmom1027 at 3:22 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Part of my issue is that she (my mom) won't be held accountable or take responsibility for anything. She claims she is a Catholic and could not leave, although we never went to church. I just feel 15 years is too long for this to go on. I am strong, but my mom tries to take credit for my accomplishments. I am proud that my kids will never wake up to a beating or other bad behaviors. I just don't agree that the "victim" should not be held accountable for her choices. Everyday there was a choice to leave regardless of the fear, and everyday that we stayed was so damaging that I cannot forgive her. I don't know how. There are so many related issues other than the violence, but my mom just smells like a sweet rose and it makes me sick because I see and know the truth.
Answer by Teachermom01 at 3:25 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Answer by Anonymous at 3:33 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
Answer by mommy16love at 4:27 PM on Dec. 30, 2009
I agree that women are responsible for getting her child(ren) out of an abusive household, I left my ex the day I realized that if I stayed my son would grow up thinking beating me and in the future his girlfriends/wife was an okay thing to do. On the other hand I do know the fear that makes women go back to an abusive man, I thought about going back to protect my son because my ex threatened to kidnap him and his mother (my ex-mil) told me several times she was supportive of him taking my son and leaving the state and I believed I would never be able to find him. The thought process of abused women is not the same as one who has never been in that situation, I was willing to have my ex beat me for the stupidest things to know he would not take my son away. I don't know your pain, I was not the child, but I am willing to bet your mother was doing what she thought was best.
Answer by goaliemom93 at 4:48 PM on Dec. 30, 2009