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hi i am elizabeth i have asked a few people about this and have not gotten many anwsers so i am turning to you. I have a 8 yr. old step son and he is alsome so sweet and just outgoing but he has a problem with his attutide his mom does not believe in me punishing him but his dad is always at work and he is with me how do i help him with out crossing the line to show him he does need to listen i have talked and my husband has talked anything will help.


Asked by babylolo235 at 2:34 PM on Jun. 25, 2008 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (5)
  • Take away privileges, make him help with chores, give him time-outs... I wouldn't spank him or anything drastic, but he needs to know that you are the boss, even if you're not his "real" mom.

    Answer by crazysocks830 at 3:00 PM on Jun. 25, 2008

  • YOUR home? YOUR RULES! Or the boy can sit in the corner with no video games or TV untill he learns to respect YOUR rules in YOUR home!

    Answer by vbruno at 3:40 PM on Jun. 25, 2008

  • I would go by the "my house" my rules policy. That said, my son goes with to my friends place. She has a few rules that are different in her house than I do in mine. He knows there are differences and he listens to them. On the other hand, if he is not allowed to say, jump on the couch, then he doesn't get to in either house. What I think you might consider is sit down with his Dad and find out what he thinks you should do. You don't want to step over the line then feel like you are walking on eggshells either. So maybe you need to have a group adult conversation. All adults come to a common agreement. If your stepson is testing you, you can't give in, or you'll never be able to trust that he will listen when your back is turned either.

    Answer by babygoose78 at 3:33 PM on Jun. 25, 2008

  • If you are his primary caregiver, you should be able to dish out punnishments. His mother needs to understand that. She seems to be jealous. Maybe she doesn't want you to take over as the "mother", but lets face it... when his dads at work and he is with you, you are.

    Answer by drowninginboys at 2:59 PM on Jun. 25, 2008

  • Start taking away his privledges. I grew up in a divorced/remarried family. The best thing you can do is to not treat him like a "step" son. Treat him as you would your own child. My 10 and 7 year old children get TV time taken away, or they get to sit in their rooms and read when they don't listen. It isn't that you are being a mean step-mom. You are being the responsible adult. I know it is hard. My step-dad never acted like a step-dad - he acted like a father. And now I respect him so much more than I ever could my real father!

    Answer by Fawn80 at 2:49 PM on Jun. 25, 2008