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Are Godmother's second mothers?

Mybest friend told me that my goddaughter is failing more than one class. I was shock and upset. My goddaughter is very spoil child. She receive a $ 1000 for Christmas. I thought that was alot for a 13 year old. But, that's not the point. Her grades aren't good and I wanted to talk to her. Her mother doesn't want her to put extra pressure on her. I was shock when she told me that. I care so much for my goddaughter like is mine. What should I do in this situation.

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Asked by DivaMom1118 at 11:53 PM on Jan. 1, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 2 (11 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • well maybe it is different for some people...but Godparents are to be the "parents" when the birthparents pass away.

    If the mom asked for help go for it...otherwise, just try to lend friendly advice here and there.

    Answer by glamomomo at 12:01 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • No you are not a second mother. It is the parents job to raise their child. You are there to support and assist in raising the child. If the parent doesn't want it, you must comply. If you ask permission from the parent to have a little talk with her about her grades and it is granted, then go ahead. Perhaps you could ask what she is dealing with that could affect her grades. There is probably an underlying reason to this that the mother understands and maybe doesn't want to share with you at this point. Good for you for caring so much, but don't overstep your bounds. The parent is the ultimate responsible person.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:02 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • LEave it to the mom. A Godparent's role is to caregive if the parents were to pass away. Unless that happens mom is in charge.

    Answer by Amberoz at 12:08 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • I know that is the parents responsibilty on raising the child, but we have been friends for over 20 years. We are each other child's godmother. I think that I would be consider a second mother to he child. I have been there since day one. If i talk to her I don't see what is the problem. She feels that she is telling me as a best friend. As a godmother, I should be able talk to my goddaughter about her grades. I could help her in anyway. I had talks with her before. I am not spanking her, so what's the problem. I am assisting raising my goddughter. I am not a figure-head godmother. I am godmother that loves her godchild like hers. I would a person like for my child.

    Answer by DivaMom1118 at 12:16 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • There's no such thing as a second mom. She has one mom and that's not you. I think you need to stay out of it until your asked to butt in.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 12:20 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • I understand that I am not her mother. I am not trying to take her place. I am trying to be there for my goddaughter and best friend. I didn't know to your godchild is a crime. My goddaughter's father is dead beat dad. Her grandparents spoil her too much. As godmother, you should be able to talk to your godchild to ask her why she is failing her classes. I don't know why should made me the godmother. Is possible, that my name can be removed.

    Answer by DivaMom1118 at 12:33 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • i dont know that i would be comfortable with my bff talking to my kid if i asked her not to. sorry, youre not a second mother. i know that the role of Godmother is to raise the child if the parents pass, but unless its in a will the child would go to the next relative.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • To me Godparents only responsibility is to care for the child if both parents were to pass on.
    It's not your place to be that child's parent, and it's not your place to parent her parents. However, if you're close with her parents then you can share your opinion. However, you shouldn't go further then that.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 1:33 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • to me godparents deside what to do and say to the child if the parents have pass away . so butt out of this one untill u are asked to help

    Answer by aprilsalcro at 1:43 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Thanks for everyone advice. I still feel this way. it's hard to change if I am so in her life. I would like my BFF more involve in daughter's life. It's not for me to tell her that. She has to want that. She get force me to less involve. She said that she will not tell me anything. Our friendship is strain because of this.

    Answer by DivaMom1118 at 9:08 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

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