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3 week old won't sleep without being held

my 3 week old can't stand not being held. I'm not sure how to break this cycle. She also doesn't like being in a sling. I can put her down for a few minutes after she falls asleep but as soon as she realizes she isn't being held...she screams! Any advice?


Asked by Mel_in_PHX at 12:11 AM on Jan. 2, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (6)
  • After 3 kids I learned to just meet newborn's needs. Hold her:) My second child was like that so I understand how you feel, but by 3 months things will turn around and you can work on it more. Enjoy the time with her;) My 7 year old doesn't want to hug or cuddle...already:(

    Answer by campeno at 12:17 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Try wrapping her real tight in a blanket.. and lay down with her... Make sure she is completely asleep before you lay her down.. She might not be in a complete sleep..

    Answer by missjenna21 at 12:17 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • first of all, try swaddling. Make sure her arms are down by her side (she may seem to struggle, but it's because she doesn't have 100% control of her arms yet, not because she doesn't like it). She will hopefully feel like she's "safe". That alone might not work, so then, ease her out of being held by putting her is a swing. that way, she will feel the motion, but not be held. when my little guy gets really cranky, he falls asleep in the swing if he's swaddled. but only if he's swaddled. He also listens to white noise at night to help him stay asleep in his bassinet.

    Look up "happiest baby on the block" on youtube or get the dvd from your local library. it is a great video showing you step by step how to swaddle properly (with a regular blanket even!) and then how to calm baby with a few other techniques. worked wonders for my little one!!! and I'm able to put him to bed without a fight now.

    Answer by LilySchey at 12:22 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • I should add, the best advise I received from another mom was to always put your baby in his/her bed drowsy, but not asleep. That way they get used to the idea of falling asleep in bed, not in your arms. Sometimes, tho, you can't help but have them sleep in your arms (or in a swing, etc.) in which case, just move them to their bed, without a fuss.

    My dad brought my half-brother to bed with him when he woulldn't fall asleep on his own. It was really hard for my dad and his new wife to break the kid out of that habit. Even years later, the kid would try to sneak into bed with them. Better off teaching them early on. If they cry, yes, hold them, don't ignore a baby who is under 3 months. Calm them down, then try to put them to bed before they are 100% asleep, so that they are too drowsy to stay awake, and will fall asleep in their bed. But after 3 months, you need to be more forceful.

    Answer by LilySchey at 12:27 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Don't use a sling. Try a wrap. I would suggest you buy or make yourself one and wrap LO while your holding them. Wear LO all day. It'll keep your hands free and her happy. Also don't wear a bra or shirt b4 you do this. Then wrap baby and wear a big sweater over both of you.

    Answer by Vero0724 at 1:23 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Hold your baby! Get a sling or other carrier. Babies need to be held and made to feel secure.

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:05 AM on Jan. 2, 2010