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I have had my daughter ever since birth, her dad was locked up up until she was 13 months, he has a record and is a felon. He lives with his mom, which is also a felon. I am currently pregnant again, and he just recently left me, and is now with my best friend...which also has a record and is a felon. I have no job, so therefore I has to get TANF to support my kids, or child support. BUT I'm scared because I don't want my babies around that bitch, she is an unfit mother, and I don't want my babies staying overnight with there father...I need help this is forcing me not to get any assistance, because i'm scared of custody rights on his end.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:30 AM on Jan. 2, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • go make a free appt with an attorney and ask if the two are handled together. in MOST places, its not, but in SOME places, they are. i'd also find out what type- if any- of custody you have. cant remember what i have, but i never went to court, was never married. i make ALL the decisions regarding my son. i get to decide if his dad gets to see him or not and i dont get in trouble if i say no. that'll never change until he files for visitation/custody. shit- i can even more outta the country without him knowing/ or getting his permission. if no one has custody (which is possible), file for it ASAP. with no custody in place, it gives him the right to just come and take your babies without it being called kidnapping. print out ALL of his offences so when/if you go to court, they will see that he's a felon/dangerous.

    if you wanna talk more, you are more than welcome to PM me.

    Answer by Shy_Dia at 3:30 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Custody and child support are NOT related. Go for support, it won't give him any more rights to visitation. What you should do is make sure you have sole physical custody, see an attorney and have it put in writing.

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 11:33 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • I second the sole physical custody.

    Answer by LuvBug3 at 11:36 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • sole physical custody, and the two are not related, also maybe just be with your kids for awhile, sounds like your "drawn " to bad boys, and this will end up causing you nothing but pain, good luck!

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:42 AM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Requesting child support does not mean that he will be allowed custody rights. A custody battle and a child support battle are two different things. Requesting child support only means you're requesting him to pay for his children. They won't seek out legal gaurdienship in this case unless you request full legal soul custody.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 12:46 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Child support, visitation rights and custody are three separate issues. You can initiate child support proceedings, request limited, supervised or no visitation rights be granted to the Father and ask to be the primary custodian. Put your fear aside and do the right thing, for your children, for the right reason. They are entitled to whatever financial support the courts impress upon him to obtain. I also highly recommend that you get both parenting classes and individual counseling so that your choices will be healthier.


    Answer by Ewadun at 1:23 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • Yep, they are seperate issues, you need to file for child support. And you need to apply for medicaid, and you could qualify for cash assistance and food stamps thru them. Also you should look into WIC so you can be eating healthy for the baby, and you would get it for your daughter too. Good luck!

    Answer by 2010Mommy2be at 2:18 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • u can also make surewhen the kids do visit they have to be watched, lik,e u can tell them that u dont feel safe having ur kids around her and

    Answer by angelairelan at 2:56 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • ok.... wait........ my baby's dad has NEVER seen him. he became emotionally abusive and he did begin abusing his dogs, so I left and his ex came back and we were done and he never cared to see his child. I haven't heard from him in 2 yrs. But to get TANF, they said I have to name the father so they can go after him to recover some of the money my son gets in medicaid/fs. I have never named his father to them b/c I fear he will go for visitation and how they will treat my son(i'm not just being bitchy, they were both abusive to each other), so are yall saying he won't automatically have rights to my son just because he is paying child support?
    Sorry to hijack ur post, but if anybody has any advise I could sure use it.

    Answer by TXColter at 8:20 PM on Jan. 2, 2010