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marriage counseling

have anyone went and did it work what do they do like do you and your hubby go together always or do they see each of you by yourself then see you together we are thinking about trying this but i just wanted to know alittle about it first thanks

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:14 PM on Jan. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • Probably depends on what's going on. The therapist may want to see you separately as well as together.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:16 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • We went to two sessions jointly and then she asked for a session with just me and recommended that I leave him - he was very controlling and domineering and also had stated that he wasn't willing to change. So - the short answer is it did help me, she helped me with some boundary issues (as in setting up some and being more assertive), but it didn't help my marriage. She did say that she would work with me even if I decided to stay with him, but that she didn't see him changing and my happiness level probably would not change unless I made a change.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 4:18 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • My hubby&I went for a few months&it did help us a lot.The first visit we basically introduced ourselves to the therapist, and told her why we were there.Then she asked to see each of us separately just to talk to us&see if there was anything we wanted to let her know but didn't want the other person to hear us talk about.If you go I would suggest asking them when you make the appointment if they could talk to you each separately for a few minutes at your visit.Doing that was very helpful for me at least.The following appointments we would review things we went over the previous weeks, and check in, talk about things going on.For example we talked at one point about how when we argued we never really talked things out. Usually my hubby would get in the car mad and leave. She suggested we at least stay in the same house (but different rooms is fine)&then when we cool down talk. At the next visit we talked about how that went

    soccerchik8287

    Answer by soccerchik8287 at 5:11 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

  • I personally would definitely suggest going. Just having a third person to mediate conversations is great. It really helped us to see what we needed to work on and what we needed to do to get our marriage where it needed to be. The counseling is a commitment though. In order for it to truly work you both really need to be committed to it, and you need to be honest with the counselor. When we went that was basically my hubby's last chance with me. He was skeptical at first, but after a few visits he really did commit to it and in the end it did help us quite a bit. I would love to start going again, just to help us stay on track with the goals we had set previously and to just help out some with a few issues we still have left

    soccerchik8287

    Answer by soccerchik8287 at 5:13 PM on Jan. 2, 2010

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