Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Does your husband have ADD/ADHD?

1. How did he act in the marriage BEFORE he got on meds?

2. How were things getting out of hand and you said "enough is enough get on meds"?

3. How did the meds make him change?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Jan. 3, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • He does have ADD... he was on meds when we met in college. I decided he'd had enough of his meds when he didn't eat anything and was losing weight.

    No trouble since. He's learned to deal with it without the use of medication

    Answer by christaberk at 10:53 AM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • Yes, my DH does. He's not on meds and the meds just help concentration, but ritalin is a stimulant that is up there with cocaine. It is extremely bad for the heart. I would not suggest that he takes that medication. People with ADHD think differently and as such there is a certain way to deal with them. For example they can't handle direct confrontation. They do better if you give them options instead. My DH is very sensitive and always feels like he's f*** up for lack of a better term. It's very difficult to live with someone like this and you must learn how to effectively communicate with him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 AM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • I have ADHD- was diagnosed as an adult... yes, meds DO help, but it also depends on the individual.

    Katt709~ Diabetes, HBP, High Cholesterol, Depression, Anxiety... They are all clinically treated with medication but can also be EFFECTIVELY treated with lifestyle/dietary changes as well.

    Anon touched on something important, and I'll expand- we're wired differently... communication is KEY, do a little research- EVERYONE is different, so what she said about confrontation does not necessarily apply, but is good to keep in mind. It has more to do with the stigma of ADD/ADHD and having been programmed by others reactions to automatically be defensive.

    I do not medicate anymore, I use Caffeine to take the edge off when I need to get something done, and I omit certain things from my diet that trigger me, like MSG, Aspertame, Food Colorings... etc. Meds MAY be the answer, but I would not say its the first course of action.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 11:13 AM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • My husband has ADHD and was diagnosed after we were married. I also am working towards my Masters in Psychology so I have some knowledge of the disorder.
    First of all ADD/ADHD are psychological disorders that present various types of symptoms and the level in which a person is affected varies from person to person.
    Medications can be helpful in severe cases but I would like to stress that the side effects associated with psychological medications can be dangerous, therefore, should only be used as a last resort in my opinion.
    My husband no longer takes medications because he did suffer some complications from the medications and they made him more like a zombie, but he did like them because he was capable of concentrating for longer periods of time.
    Living with him can be difficult. He will start projects but fails to finish them. So I have about 10 projects around my house that are not finished.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:39 AM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • but ritalin is a stimulant that is up there with cocaine

    jaw drop and yet they get this to elementary kids.   wowowowow


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:48 AM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • My dh has always suspected that he has ADD but his mom doesn't believe in it and never did anything about it. It wasn't until our son was diagnosed and started seeing doc's that he started realizing that he has all the same things they have listed. He doesn't take medication though. I think he's learned to deal with it as much as possible in his 34 years.

    He doesn't finish things, he's impulsive with everything and often does things before he thinks. He thinks he's not good enough either, but this stems from growing up in a family with 2 brothers without ADD who did well in school who got all the praise.

    But anyway, it's just something you learn to deal with! Btw, my son is not on stimulant meds either, I refuse to put him on "hard drugs". We will find ways to manage!

    Answer by all4mymarine at 12:04 PM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • I have ADHD and I'm not on any meds.  My dh and I have both learned my quirks and weaknesses and we've learned how to deal with it and when to roll with it. 

    If you want your marriage to flourish, you had better learn to do the same, because the ADHD isn't going to go away.


    Answer by beeky at 1:01 PM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • Yes. Send me a message offlist

    Answer by rkoloms at 3:33 PM on Jan. 3, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.