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This Question may be fickle..but mother in law...

Okay so according to my husband his mother hasn't like anyone he's ever been with. She tolerates, but not 'liked them". Thats what he says as I wasn't in his previous relationships. Lately every little thing she does upsets me, maybe it's cause I'm pregnant. But here goes, for Christmas she made one of those digital shutterfly photo albums highlighting from childhood till present. It's very nice "cept ONE thing. There's a prom picture there of him and his exwife! They don't have kids together and what's the point in that. And I see it as she didn't even have a graduation pic in there (accepting diploma) but has his prom with his ex wife. That sort of upset I over-reacting? She's welcome to keep those pictures, but isn't graduation more significant than prom? Funny, she didn't add our engagement or wedding pics or pics with our first son.....This upsets me.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:28 PM on Jan. 3, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • You can't cahnge others. You can only change the way you react to them. Maybe she did do it intentionally...don't give her the satisfaction of knowing it upset you. Make your own album of "Our Family" Engagement -kids and share it. Hormones are raging in pregnancy and I know for me personally I took everything more personal then.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:33 PM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • I can understand being upset. I feel the same way with my MIL... she has never liked me and dh together- she had issues that we are not the same race. She 'lost' our wedding album... by 'lost' I mean she left it at a friend's house and never got back to reclaim it in the last twelve years! The only picture of our wedding that she has anywhere in her house is a picture of their family only- my dh, his brother, and MIL/FIL. The only picture I'm not in! She also keeps the pictures of our kids on a shelf in her master bathroom! When you add in the fact that she has tons of pictures of BIL and SIL's wedding (which they arranged) it's more than a little hurtful. I try not to let it get to me because there's just no point. She's never going to like me, I'm going to be cordial to them for the sake of the kids and although it does hurt it's not worth investing a ton of emotional energy in.

    Answer by Freela at 11:34 PM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • I'd react the same way ask Hubby bout it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 PM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • In the same boat Freela will pray things get better for us both!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:37 PM on Jan. 3, 2010

  • She made this as a gift for him? If so you can take the card out and delete that photo if it bugs you that much. Don't let her get to you...if she didn't do it on purpose then you are getting worked up for nothing and if she did do it on purpose then you are giving her exactly what she wants by letting it bother you. Rise above it and move on :)

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 12:52 AM on Jan. 4, 2010

  • You are fighting a losing battle. There is no way you can make this woman like you nor can you make her behave any differently than she does now. So let it go. These are the kinds of people who enjoy that they are able to upset you. It's what brings them pleasure in life. So the best thing you can do is totally ignore her efforts to upset you. And I don't think it has one thing to do with the fact that you are pregnant.

    Answer by NannyB. at 5:43 AM on Jan. 4, 2010

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