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How do you handle a child who doesn't behave/listen?

What types of discipline have you found effective for a child who does things just to bug you when he knows better, or is mean for no reason. What do you do if you can't physically remove the child and yelling doesn't work? I've tried just about everything I can think of from positive reinforcment, time-outs, taking things away, even spanking... but nothing seems to phase him.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:38 PM on Jan. 4, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • Maybe he just wants attention? Maybe ignore him. If he's five, sit him down and get him to talk to you. See if he'll open up about what he really wants. Mabye he wants one on one time with you or maybe he needs more structure and chores (ie seeing that his actions have consequences). It's tough no matter what the age to find the best approach. Good luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Jan. 4, 2010

  • Whatever form of discipline you use you have to remain consistent. Just using it once doesn't do it. You have to remain consistent for several weeks before what you are using will be effective.

    Answer by coala at 3:45 PM on Jan. 4, 2010

  • OP here: Sorry I should have put this in the question. He is 5 and we've used consistently positive reinforcment combined w/ timeouts from ages 1 to age 4. Then we tried taking things away and spankings from age 4 to now.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:50 PM on Jan. 4, 2010

  • i have found with my daughter who is 19 months is we count to 3 she knows if we say 3 she gets spanked. we also didnt just start, from the time she was able to understand what i was saying, that is when we started. some people may think that its too soon, or that spanking a young child is. but she is a really good toddler. she listens very well for 19months, and is a happy healthy little girl! i have seen what happens when people wait too long to disapline their child and mine wont be one of those. she knows i love her and i dont spank hard enough to hurt her just enough so she knows i mean business. but i agree with answer 1 whatever you do, you must be consistant. and if you have to remove your child you should that will also show them you are serious.

    Answer by babymaddy at 3:52 PM on Jan. 4, 2010

  • If they are old enough to write sentences have them do that and I totally agree with on top of it.GL

    Answer by Butterfly1108 at 3:52 PM on Jan. 4, 2010

  • I don't think anything works as well as good old fashioned spanking of the bare legs and butt. He is old enough to understand the rules and the consequences for disobeying them. At 5, I would use a small plastic flyswatter and I would spank him on bare skin, hard enough that it stings. You will never teach your child anything that is more valuable than respect for authority and obedience to those in authority over him. Set the boundaries and then consistently enforce them. It will take longer at 5 to retrain him than it would have at 2, but it is not too late. You should be the queen of your own castle and you must begin today to retrain your loyal subjects. You can explain to him that you love him too much to tolerate such unacceptable behavior.

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:56 PM on Jan. 4, 2010