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How can I stop my daughter's tantrums?

My daughter loves to throw fits, especially at bedtime. She throws herself on the floor and kicks and screams. You can hear her all the way outside and it sounds like we're beating her. If I shut the door to her room, she bangs her head into the door and has recently started destroying things, like her nightlight because she's angry with us. People have told me to let her cry it out, but her fits can go on for longer than an hour, and we're disturbing our neighbors. I'm starting to worry that someone's going to call children's services on us because she's making so much noise.


Asked by baenglishwc05 at 12:27 PM on Jan. 5, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (7)
  • The best way I found was to actively ignore her. I would pick up a newspaper and hide my face behind it. The only thing I would say to her is "I do not like this behavior and as soon as you stop acting this way I will talk to you again." She would try to get between the paper and my face, I'd turn around, walk to the other side of the room, even if that meant stepping over her in the floor, whatever..just giving ZERO attention while she was acting that way did wonders! It took her a few times to try my willpower, but she got the message quickly enough. Supernanny's bedtime routine works great too---IF you stick to your guns. Good luck! :)


    Answer by SimplyLaine at 1:39 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • Toddler Taming: A Survival Guide for Parents by Dr. Christopher Green. You'll find all the tricks and understanding you need in here. Hang on to your sanity though. It does pass. But if reading would be too daunting or time comsuming Harvey Karp has the best ideas of all. But his DVD is pricey. How desperate are you???


    Answer by JWMomElizabeth at 12:34 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • well you are obviously not a spanker or u would have done that long ago!

    Answer by secondtyme520 at 12:38 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • I forgot to add that the few times I've tried the spanking thing, her fits are longer and louder and she just shouts "Mommy don't hurt me" over and over again ...

    Answer by baenglishwc05 at 12:41 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • I have a book for strong willed children that has been helpful. there are tons out there, also, watching nanny 911 helps in the bedtime area's too.

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 1:08 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • Have you tried throwing a tantrum yourself? Throw the biggest one you can as soon as she starts. I'm talking throwing yourself on the floor, beating the floor, yelling, etc. My dh did this and it stopped it pretty quick. He thought it was funny.

    Answer by baconbits at 1:45 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • well dont spank anymore just threaten to..remind her of how it stings to get her bum popped when shes not being a good girl and tell her thats what will happen from now on if she screams or doesnt get in bed! my daughter is 5 and RARELY gets a spanking now because she remembers what it feels like and all i have to do is mention the small switch that i keep in the closet and she does not want that!! so she goes to bed with very little trouble. now her little bro is 19 mos and goes to bed almost as easily he usually has to see the switch before he will jump under the covers and wait for their story!!!

    Answer by secondtyme520 at 8:45 PM on Jan. 6, 2010