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the dog died n my son is so upset..please help

my 11yr old son is very upset yest he came home from school he cryed n locked him selfself in his room we got in n talked to him..he stayed up pretty late he was upset. he went to schhol went to his counsler n cryed n was upset..n now again he is crying n locked in his room. idk what to do for him we got a little nick nack type thing he can put by the dog.im lost for words n actions.its hard for me to be upset along with him cause i really wasnt into the dog i mean of course i feel bad but idk what to do..than to top it off he came home from school telling me the counsler told him hes fibbing n the dog didnt die he was tired cause he played video games all night n the my dh didnt bury him cause he couldnt dig up the ground cause it was frozen(we live in ny lots of snow)so that made him wonder about the whole thing.im just stressed beyond stressed. ive had alot of things going on this week n this tops it off what can i do

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mommyny6

Asked by mommyny6 at 9:00 PM on Jan. 5, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 8 (230 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Fist off you need to put that counselor in her/his place. Then you need to tell him that the dog is happy where he is, and that he will always have the memories of their time together, and that the dog will always be apart of him. Maybe your attitude about the dog is showing and that is also causing him to be so upset. Maybe if you cried with him he would feel better. I know I would if our dog died. Remember the dog is also part of the family. Good luck.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 9:05 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • FIRST contact the JACKASS counselor and tell them exactly what happened. Next talk to your doctor about grief counseling. Then, pick out a puppy when he is ready.
    Whatkids

    Answer by Whatkids at 9:05 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • im sorry you couldnt relate to your son about the dog..in that fact he is all alone in his sorrow..losing a pet for some is like losing a child, or sibling..they are like a family member..honestly as someone who has lost several pets over the years the best medicine for a broken heart after losing a pet is to get a new puppy...he will probably cry a lil still but he will feel alot better every time he looks at the new puppy and he will make a bond with it..theres nothing wrong with your son being so upset over his lil friend..as far as the school maybe you should call the counsler and talk to them yourself and tell them to back off..obviously your son is very hurt over this...i hope you find a new friend for your son..tell him i am very sorry to hear about his dog...hugs
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:06 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • thank above answerers..i did cry with him yest n it seemed to help him for a little while..i cant get a new puppy.my 3 yr old doesnt do good with dogs he was bite by the one we are talking about.the reason we didnt get rid of him was because he had cancer n we had him away from my 3 yr old but didnt want him to dye with someone who wouldnt care for him n i hear storys about people just dumping dogs n i couldnt wonder about that. but im sure as hell going to put her in her place if my dh doesnt 1st thanks..
    mommyny6

    Answer by mommyny6 at 9:12 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • I agree with PP, my DH and I lost a puppy who got sick before we got her and we were in so much misery the guy who gave her to us gave us another puppy from the liter and we healed better and much faster than we would have without the new puppy.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 9:13 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • awwe I'm so sorry. My husband has this horrible saying, but I think it's kind of true. "Nothing gets you over the last one, like the next one." Get him another dog.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • Just so you know a 3 year old will not put the DOG bite with a new PUPPY and will actually get over the fear of dogs with a new puppy growing up with him. I was bit by a dog at that age and once I had a puppy of my own I was ok with dogs. It can help heal both your children.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 9:16 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • hes not really scared of dogs that much he tends to pull there ears n bite on them too. idk if a new puppy would be a good idea any breeds you suggest that would be ok with kids of all ages n cats..not a very big dog the one that passed was a boxer n he was to big for me..i couldnt handle walking him (back prob.)
    mommyny6

    Answer by mommyny6 at 9:21 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • omfgwthiwtja You should make a complaint about that counsellor to the Board of Education - chances of them doing anything about it is zero but the creep still should have a complaint made in writing of the trauma they caused your ds. I am so so sorry. You are so good to be so concerned. I had to make decisions to euthanize three of our animals - two dogs and a cat. All three were very very ill and had heroic measures taken to save them. We'd do it over again. Tell dear son just that the animal's time on earth was done. Whether or not you believe in God or a higher being, sometimes death and children is the time to tinker with the idea for child's comfort. Pet Lovely is now in a place where moments or an hour of pain is gone and won't come back. A higher being (God? Nature? something!?) decides all of a sudden it is time to journey on into to a place of no pain. No one but that higher being ever ever decides that. Hugs!
    lfl

    Answer by lfl at 9:29 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

  • Yes get a lab, my lab lays there while my 19 month DD pulls her ears pokes her eyes bounces on her back kisses her bites her pulls her tail, and my in-laws lab is the same way with her and they were grown when she was born so a puppy would have a blast with him like minds and all of that.
    truealaskanmom

    Answer by truealaskanmom at 9:39 PM on Jan. 5, 2010

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