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My 3 year old refuses to go poop in a potty!

My son is still in potty training mode. He now pee's in the potty and rarely has an accident even while he naps in under wear he will wake up and go pee then go back to sleep. But th moment he has to poop he just goes in whatever he is wearing or on the floor. I have bought the small pottys and the seats that go over the toilet in his favorite characters, sticker charts, toys and all kinds of treats and rewards but it is not working. I can not put him in daycare because he will be put in the lower age group and not his own because he is not fully potty trained. He is being held back because of his stubborness to go poop in the potty. He will even start to cry when i dont let him up because I know he has to go. I need all the advice I can get. Please help!

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jenmcwhorter1

Asked by jenmcwhorter1 at 2:07 PM on Jan. 6, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (8)
  • Have him around older kids that can encourage it.

    I rewarded my son with a match box car, it worked for him.

    Eventually he started to do it naturally, no reward necessary.
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 2:10 PM on Jan. 6, 2010

  • Boys are often harder to potty train than girls, and I know a lot of kids having this same issue. My son did the same thing, sorry to say he is finally fully trained at 4 lol it was a long road (by fully i mean no accidents no bed wetting wiping etc) He had the peeing down at like 3 but the pooping took him forever he just had to do it on his own time. With any type of potty training exp. I always say you should let the child do it when they feel ready because sometimes if you push too hard they revolt. Good luck momma, it will happen!
    82ndairbornewif

    Answer by 82ndairbornewif at 2:13 PM on Jan. 6, 2010

  • Make him stand in the cornor with a big turd in his pants for a long time, and when anyone walks by him say "WHAT SMELLS LIKE POOP----EWWWWWWW ICKY GROSS----Even though he knows you know because when you put him in the cornor you told him it was for going in his pants. Then take him in the bathroom and make him clean his own underware--- and shame him while he does it-----("shame on you, isn't that gross, turds go in the potty----ishy, do you like cleaning yucky poop----I sure don't thats why god made toliets!!!) SHAME, ON YOU!!! Then back to the cornor to think about it.

    Mommy shame is a powerful tool you might as well use it, if you got it right!!!
    blue_glass_mama

    Answer by blue_glass_mama at 2:27 PM on Jan. 6, 2010

  • Oh, I think "Mommy Shame" is a horrible tool. It is powerful, there is no doubt about that, but it has the power to destroy self esteem and humiliate a child. I understand parenting can be frustrating and try your patience, but you have to parent with love as much as possible. I think Mommy Love and Mommy Approval are much more effective tools.

    OP- I haven't reached potty training with my little one yet so I can't offer any tips, only wish you luck, I just has to speak out on the Mommy Shame approach- I hope you are offerred other, more effective strategies. Good luck.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 4:12 PM on Jan. 6, 2010

  • MaryMW---didn't you read she said---"I have bought the small pottys and the seats that go over the toilet in his favorite characters, sticker charts, toys and all kinds of treats and rewards but it is not working. I can not put him in daycare because he will be put in the lower age group and not his own because he is not fully potty trained. He is being held back because of his stubborness to go poop in the potty. He will even start to cry when i dont let him up because I know he has to go. I need all the advice I can get." THAT KID IS PLAYING HER LIKE A GUITAR-JUST PLUCKING THE STRINGS! IT HAS BECAME A POWER STRUGGLE!JUST LIKE THOSE STUPID PEOPLE ON NANNY 911 WHOS KID WON'T SLEEP WITHOUT THE PARENTS-IT'S NOT CUTE IT DISRUPTS THE WHOLE FAMILY JUST LIKE THIS KIDS POOP-SHE HAS TO SHOW HIM WHO IS THE BOSS AND DEMAND RESPECT
    I AM VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT THIS BECAUSE PEOPLE SAY I AM TOO HARD ON MY KIDS,BUT THEY HAVE RESPECT & LOVE
    blue_glass_mama

    Answer by blue_glass_mama at 5:24 PM on Jan. 6, 2010

  • Blue Glass- I did read what the OP said and it sounds like she has tried a lot of things and is getting frustrated. I agree with some of your points, a firm hand is definitely needed in raising children, however I think parents should strive to command respect rather than have to demand it. Parents should treat their children with respect. The tactics you suggested sound to me like belittling, berating and humiliating a child, and I believe all of these things are DISrespectful to the child. While the strategy might work, I wonder at what price? It basically seems like bullying a child into doing what is desired. Like I said, I haven't potty trained a child yet so I don't have solutions to offer, I just wanted to speak my mind on the solution offerred by you. I understand that we can't just allow children to set their own rules and limits, but as parents we also have to set some rules and limits for ourselves.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 11:10 AM on Jan. 7, 2010

  • i actually think the shame on you thing will make it worse. but to each their own.
    82ndairbornewif

    Answer by 82ndairbornewif at 4:49 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Blue Glass- your answer is for shock appeal right? Not actual advice--right?
    rooster3

    Answer by rooster3 at 5:32 PM on Jan. 19, 2010

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