Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do I keep my son from hurting me without hurting his feelings?

I recently underwent a major surgery on my spine (Dec. 8th 2009) They fused 3 of my discs together with screws and rods. My son is constantly wanting to hug and squeeze me. He knows it hurts me and he seems to understand the severity of the surgery. When I remind him that he can't do that yet he gets upset and almost seems angry with me. How do I handle this? He is a very intelligent 7 year old, almost 8...but immature in social skills. I don't want him to think I am rejecting him or pushing him away.

Answer Question

Asked by KimberleyJo at 11:01 PM on Jan. 7, 2010 in Health

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • just tell him you had surgery & it hurts if he hugs too hard because he is so strong.. it will make him feel good to think he is strong..

    Answer by maiahlynn at 11:03 PM on Jan. 7, 2010

  • Ouch!! My mom had major back surgery when I was around your son's age. Tell him what you had done if you haven't already. Hopefully it will give him some idea of what it feels like. Wishing you a speedy recovery.

    Answer by LaurenKaye29 at 11:14 PM on Jan. 7, 2010

  • mak up a spcial song or handshake that he can do smethign simple that just you two know so its a secrect way to tell you he loves you without hurting you he will love the fact that him and mommy have a secret.

    Answer by jajamama at 7:43 AM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I think you need to come up with some other thing for the two of you to do when he wants affection. Like holding his hand; scratching his back; having him lay with his head in your lap; giving him a kiss. You can just say "I can't hug you right now, but why don't you come and sit with me and hold my hand".

    Answer by EmilyandIsaac at 8:43 AM on Jan. 8, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Health

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
Middle name help