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Did you feel like you couldn't breast feed?

My husband & I split up during my pregnancy, so I was a single Mom literally from day 1. He moved to California shortly after she was born and was never a help with her after we came home from the hospital. I'm living about 3,ooo miles away from any family at the moment so it was just me and baby. I was just aware that I wasn't eating as well as I needed to. I eventually stopped breast feeding at 3 wks and opted to use formula with baby. I really wanted to do it, but my breasts are rather large, and it was exhausting to pump and then feed... then adding in all of the stuff I needed to eat daily & remembering to take vitamins going through all of that, I figured it was just better for her to be on formula so I know she is getting her nutrients.

Now, I make sure I stick with DHA products and I only use Enfamil Lipil with DHA/ARA.

Anyone else been through this? I guess I am feeling guilty, even though its been several months


Asked by Anonymous at 4:04 PM on Jan. 8, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • I only made it 6 weeks. I was in pain and realized I made a better mom than a feed bag. It hurt so bad, I was honestly afraid to hold my own child. I knew it wasn't for me then. But I will try again with the next child. Never know what will happen then. :) Don't feel bad. It's better to feed your child. There are so many stresses, sometimes it's more important to find a few ways to help relieve that stress than force something (such as nursing) and risk being pushed over the edge and doing something stupid.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:14 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I breast fed for only a month. I feel bad that i stopped. I only quit because he would nurse for two hours straight and might sleep 30 minutes and be right back for another 2 hours. Over and over. I didn't know the first thing about nursing really, and thought he wasn't satisfied. He is 13 and I haven't had anymore kids so, yeah, I still feel guilty.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 4:08 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • popcorn


    Answer by Anonymous at 4:08 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I am pro brestfeeding, but there are times when a mom can't. I really think the only way to be successful with BFing is if you have tremendous support. You didn't have that. You have done a wonderful job with what you had. And that is the most anyone can expect from us.
    Don't feel guilty about it. Millions of babies are fed formula and they do fine. Trust me your baby will not resent you for not breastfeeding!

    Answer by Nathskitten at 4:09 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Don't feel guilty, but I want you to know for the future, should you have another child and want to nurse, that you don't need to eat anything special, or anything. Even if you don't eat healthy, your baby will not suffer. YOUR health might, but your baby will still receive the best. My breasts are more then rather large, and it IS difficult, and I had a LOT of support. You do what you can, and you learn as you live. May I ask why you were pumping? I'm assuming for work since you are a single mother. Don't feel bad. However, should you decide you DO want to nurse, you CAN start again, even after switching to formula. If you ARE interested in relactating, I can try to help, or point you in the right direction. I hope I don't seem pushy, I just want to make sure you have all the information that is available to you. Good luck to you and enjoy your little one!


    Answer by Krysta622 at 4:10 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I never even attempted it. I knew from the start that it just wasn't for me. I never once felt guilty either. My baby is well taken care of.

    Answer by MLM0503 at 4:12 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I could do breasts were too large and my nipples sons bio dad left when i was 6 months i k now how u feel. I wanted to breast feed..but i tried it once..and it just wasn't working.

    I used Good Start Soy with DHA for my son and hes very healthy. We couldnt use ANY Enfamil products because it made him exteremly sick. I don't feel guilty about it and don't allow anyone else to make me feel guilt about MY decision for MY child.

    Answer by SweetPoison at 4:12 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I want to add, I DID feel that I couldn't breast feed. My daughter, (my 1st child) I had such a hard time nursing in the hospital. I saw the LC a few times, but was exhausted as any new mom, and didn't quite know just how important, and beneficial, and special nursing is. I gave up. Bottle fed formula when we came home. She was quite the cranky, colicky newborn. When she was 5 days old, it was a particular difficult evening, and DH said, why don't you just give it one more try. It'd been at least 2 days since I'd attempted to nurse or pump. Well, it seems she had other plans for us. She latched right on, like a pro, nursed for quite a while, you could actually hear her swallowing, and let out a big burp when she was done. AND, she wasn't cranky. I mean, sure she was still colicky, but things changed when she began nursing. We EBF from that point on, and she continued to nurse until 13 1/2 months!

    Answer by Krysta622 at 4:18 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I think you need to ask yourself WHY you feel guilty.If it's because of all the BF crazies here on Cafemom who think the measure of a perfect mother is one who breastfeeds all the time, 24/7 until her child is old enough to drive a car, then you have no reason to feel guilty. I was going to exclusively BF my first, and then on the advice of a Lactation Consultant, I gave him a bottle of formula when he was 6 days old, which started a vicious cycle of decreasing my milk supply. By the time he was 7 months old, I had no milk whatsoever. With my second, I was much more relaxed and educated so I nursed and pumped exclusively and he never got formula. Do I feel guilty about not nursing my first one exclusively? No, because I did what I was told was best at the time. Breastfeeding doesn't make one a good mother. There are lots of BF crazies on here that I sincerely question their mothering ability. You have no cause for guilt.

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 4:20 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I tried ONE TIME didn't hurt or anything, I just couldn't handle it! A very uncomfortable weird unnerving feeling! So I formula fed and haven't regretted it once! My child is a perfectly healthy 5 year old and has no allergies like me, can drink all the milk without getting sick and is a lot healthier than I am! I am very happy with my choice and would do it again in a heartbeat!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:21 PM on Jan. 8, 2010