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what to do my DH friend likes me I don't like him I am married, but need advice

Ok the thing is he tells my DH how cute I am and that he is a lucky man and that he better treat me good or he will take me in a heartbeat. He always jokes about all kinds of things to DH about me which don't bother me, but then he does this that if I say something he says he thinks that is sexy or whatever in front of DH he doesn't say anything cause I think he knows he wont go after me cause I am taken, but he already said if anything ever happened to DH and me he would leave his wife for me in a heart beat. His wife is soooo jelous of me she gives me mean looks and if I am sitting on the couch he sits beside me she tells me...ME to get up and IT IS MY OWN HOUSE so I don't like her coming over, but then I have him who comes over when DH isn't home not trying nothing just comes over, but DH doesn't tell him not to come over and I don't like when he comes over when DH isn't home his wife already does like me for whatever CON

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:18 PM on Jan. 8, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • I didn't read all the responses, but if it were me, the next time he said or did anything (and make sure his wife is there...) I would say, "Dude, that is so rude to your wife, and let's get one thing straight, if this is how you disrespect your wife, you can be damn sure that if anything ever did happen to DH you are the last person I'd be interested in, I have no desire to be with a man who treats their wife they way you treat yours." And you can say it half serious, half joking, but perhaps he will get the message and perhaps she will appreciate it.
    gramsmom

    Answer by gramsmom at 5:48 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • what should I do??? DH doesn't say anything to him and I don't know how to say something. Also a few weeks ago they got in a fight over me I guess he yelled at her and they got in a arguement he said he was leaving she said where are you going to (my name) house? He threw her up against the wall by the throat and told her not to talk about his friends like that. What can I do???
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:20 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • You need to sent him straight and if he doesn't get the message, you need to tell your husband how much it really bothers you, maybe he can get through to him.
    Cindy18

    Answer by Cindy18 at 5:22 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • i think his wife sees that he likes you. and i think you shouldnt get upset over the fact that she doesnt want you to sit by him for all you know maybe he tells her that you are the flirtacious one withhim. i think you should try to talk to your hubbyand explain that you dont feel comfortable with him coming over when hes not there and that you dont like his flirtacious remarks about you ! { i had the same problem with my hubby & his 2 friends} i finally told my hubby that that was not a friend and that that was disrespectfull towards me & him... he eventually talked to them and stopped talking to them....
    Naralie

    Answer by Naralie at 5:24 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • omg also that girl of his needs to leave him he ccould be getting obsessed with you because he has no right to grab her by the neck to defend a friend unless he has something to hide
    Naralie

    Answer by Naralie at 5:26 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I agree with Naralie. Who knows that he is saying to his wife. I think that you should talk to your husband about this. I am sure he wouldn't want you to feel so uncomfortable. My husbands friends do not come over unless my husband is home or if I am friends with their wife or g/f and they come along too. I think that is just inappropriate. And if talking to your husband doesn't work then I would make sure and tell the guy to back off. Make it clear in the things you say that you love your husband and would never betray him.
    Frogbaby83

    Answer by Frogbaby83 at 5:29 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Naralie

    I understand where you are coming from and what you are saying, but he is the one the comes and sits by me shouldn't she say something to him?

    Also his wife is a dancer she dances at a bar then on her days off for extra money she has sex with her clients she told me not to say anything and her DH told my DH that he thinks she has sex cause one night she brought home 600 in an hour. But I stay out of it that is why I am not saying anything.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:41 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • You hit the nail on the head, gramsmom.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 6:33 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • first of all whats wrong with your husband?! My husband would tell his friend what he could do.. He wouldnt put up with someone always hitting on me. Besides why is he over your house when your DH isnt home? You need to just flat out tell him he is creeping you out and you love her husband and he needs to stop coming over PERIOD.
    maybebaby83

    Answer by maybebaby83 at 6:41 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • maybebaby83

    I don't know DH says he talked to him and stuff but he still does that stuff to me. Or he will tell me that he will talk to him. He just shows up at my house when DH is at work. His wife works up the street from us so he drops her off then comes here, but I don't like it
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:14 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

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