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Am i being to harsh on my boyfriend?

I have one daughter at home, and one on the way with my boyfriend. We live together and he likes the guys to come over and have a party every once a month or so. I work six days a week and have been very ill with this pregnancy. I dont mind if he goes out with them but dont want the parting at my house or around my daughter cause they get wild. We plan on getting married but im worried about his friends and partying coming before his family. He thinks im always not being understanding? Am i being too harsh

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:03 PM on Jan. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • no, i agree with you that kids should not be around partying, when as you say it gets wild. There is a big difference between a few adults enjoying a quiet drink at home and a bunch of so called adults wooping and hollaring while getting drunk.

    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 6:05 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • that is why people date befor getting married - to see if the man is a "real" man and the right man.

    I personally wouldnt marry a man like that... but now you are pregnant and can not make a choice that is easy... now anything you choose will be hard.

    best of luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:12 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • If you are not freaking out when he goes to a single friend's house or out to the bar (so long as he is responsible and not driving himself home) occasionally, I see no problem with it. Now, if his friends come over every other weekend to watch them game and they just have a few beers or whatever, then I would be ok with that. But if it gets loud, wild, or unsafe, they shouldn't be in your house. I think you are being reasonable.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 6:13 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I know I'm not you, but all I can do is give my own opinion...I'd be happy he was at home instead of off at the bars possibly screwin around with other women so ya, imo you're being too harsh. Is your house small? Are you able to ask him to have the parties downstairs or in a different room seperate from you and your daughter?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:23 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • i think you are right he needs to grow up and be a man! you need to let him know he needs to make some changes because your not tolerating it
    Naralie

    Answer by Naralie at 6:24 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Id be upset.. i think you have every right to be.. you have a child at home and like you said you are not feeling well wiith this pregnancy.. he should understand that and be more simpathetic! Sounds like he has alot of growing up to do.. you really need to talk to him and see what you both really want.. maybe he can calm down with the guy time to like once a month
    maybebaby83

    Answer by maybebaby83 at 6:26 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • We have a party here once a month. When I was pregnant they got a little loud and even now the volume level is a bit higher than your usual tea party but DH's friends are all kid friendly so DS is usually out with us until he's ready for bed. I would say though, if you're not feeling well ask him if someone else can host for a while. When it's at your house, tell them they need to chill out a bit so as not to wake your daughter. I think it would be harsh to tell him he can't have a party ever, especially since it's only once a month but I don't see a problem with asking them to keep it down.
    flitpixie

    Answer by flitpixie at 6:38 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • What most upsets me is when they come over its not planned and my BF has agreed to watch my daughter the next day while im at work. He will stay out late so i get up and have minutes notice to find a sitter cause i dont want him to be hung over and take it out on her. When im not pregnant i do drink occasionally but my not a whole lot cause i know that im a mother and i have responsibilities. I wish his friends had kids and they would be more understanding and not think that im trying to control my BF. I told him that if he wants he can pick one day a month to go with the guys and ill get a sitter for my daughter the next day.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:46 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I think its time to leave all the partying behind him.He has a family now,that childness should be a thing of the past.there has to be something else he can do to unwind and relax,thats ridiculous.
    TMJ121099

    Answer by TMJ121099 at 6:54 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Once a month seems a little excessive to me, so no I don't think you are being too harsh. It's not like you are telling him he can't go out at all.
    Rebecca7708

    Answer by Rebecca7708 at 11:09 PM on Jan. 10, 2010

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