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Unsure of what to do. Advice PLEASE.

I'm 20yrs old and I have a 18 month old and a 4 month old. Me and my boyfriend split up a coulple days ago, its been rocky for a long time, and I found out that I was pregnant again a few weeks ago. I have no idea wether or not me and my boyfriend will ever get back together and I have no Idea what I am going to do about the pregnancy. I have no Idea how far along I am. I have been having symptoms for two or three months and I took 4 preggo test which came out negative. Ever since my dds birth my periods have been like 1 day long, but I missed my period that was supposed to come on the 27th, thats how I know for sure. Should I get an abortion, I am against it normally, or keep the baby with a broken home?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:30 PM on Jan. 8, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (16)
  • You don't know for sure you are pregnant until you get a positive test. It could be your thyroid off or something else. Get to a doctor.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Kids should not be having kids! And, kids should be brought into this world only and if there is a stable partnership! I know this doesn't answer your question or help your situation but seriously...I feel sorry for those kids. I would give it up for adoption to a stable couple who can't have kids.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:36 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Whoa whoa whoa...just because you missed a period does not mean you are for sure pregnant. Like anon need to get to a doctor and find out if you are even pregnant before you start freaking out about what to do. And as for to abort the baby or not...I'm not going to give you one of my usually lengthy speeches on how horrible abortion is because I feel that that is all I'm ever doing here on cafemom...but I will tell you this. A broken home is not ideal but DEATH is the most unideal situation you could EVER put an innocent child in.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • That baby shouldn't be punished because you can't make your boyfriend wear a condom!

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 10:40 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • to the first anonymous response thats not an answer to her question that was mean and this is not a website for all that we're supposed 2 be supportive of one another........i think u should keep it if u r pregnant because the lord isn't going to put more on us than we can bare everything will fall into place pray and keep ur head up!! but go find out if u r for sure pregnant though!!!!!!

    Answer by lilmechi225 at 10:41 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • why r ya'll being so harsh? gosh i never saw this much bashing on here!!! SMH

    Answer by lilmechi225 at 10:44 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • Get on birth control. Immediately. I'm not trying to be rude, but you really need to stop having kids. Your personal life is all fricked up, and you're potentially fricking up your kids' life, with all this uncertainty surrounding your baby's father (fathers?).

    A "broken home" is a home where the parent or parents don't have their act together, and it causes problems for the children.

    Good luck, and I hope you make the right decisions in your children's interest.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:46 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • You broke the home. Don't punish the child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:48 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • I am sure that you love your children with all of your heart and soul, but you do have to ask yourself how you are going to support three children by yourself. Yes, there is state support, but is that really the life you want your children to have??? There are a lot of stigmatisims that go along with "being on the welfare." I am one that believes in pro choice, but it would not be the choice that i would make. There are lots of people that are dying to adopt a healthy baby. You might consider an open adoption so that you, your child, and his/her siblings can all have a relationship. In the meantime, I would suggest going to the State Health department and see what kind of birth control is available for after the baby is born.

    In the end it's your choice. I would pray, pray and pray some more.
    Know you and your children are in my prayers. Good luck

    Answer by andreabwdn at 10:50 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

  • OP HERE First of all condoms were used. we got a bad box I guess because almost all broke. Second of all I dont feel sorry for my kids. I love my kids to death and yeah there are a lot of young moms out there but I take care of my kids 100% unlike most of my friends whose parents watch thiem more than they do, lets put it this way my oldest was watched for the 1st time since I had her sister and only because I was going christmas shopping. No body has ever taken care of my youngest besides my self and ex-bf, and my oldest only a handful of times. As for me know I'm pregnat, I know my body, I've never missed a period except for when I was preggos and I know how I feel when I am preggo. And thank you andrea, that was helpful but adoption is not an option for me. I cannot bring a child into this world and just give it to someone else to raise. I support those who do but it is something that I could never do.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:26 PM on Jan. 8, 2010

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