Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I have three children what do you think about my boyfriend moving in his two special needs children? ages 6 and 7 with major behavior problems

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on Jan. 9, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Not enough info. Are you concerned about how it will affect your kids? How old are your kids? Do your kids have any of their own issues? How long have you and your boyfriend been together? How do your kids feel about him and his kids? How do his kids feel about you and your kids? Lots of things to consider when making a decision like this.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 3:27 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • A lot factors must be weighted in: what kind of problems do those children have? How long have you and your boyfriend been together? Are you and your boyfriend in it for the long haul or just wanting to live together? I think it is a huge mistake to have your boyfriend move in if there's no long-term plans, such as marriage or some sort of future together. It sends the kids on unjustable roller-coaster if you allow another man to live with them only to break up with that man later. Kids need stability. Also, are you willing to deal with his special needs children along with your three? Don't doubt they will become a part of your responsibility! You'd be expected to treat them as your own and try to help those children with their challenges. Think long and hard about this, and make sure you lay out the groundworks with your boyfriend first. Good luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:27 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • Honestly, it will be the biggest mistake of your life. Trust me on this one.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:35 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • Please do not let him move in. Eventually, he may get jealous of the relationship that you have with your kids. Right now your children should be your main priority. I know that you may need the attention of a Man, but do not let him move in with you and your children. Do not let him invade you all space. Just my opininon. Anyway, what are his intentions some men prey on women who get extra money because their children are special needs. Keep your eyes and ears open!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:08 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • My friend think hard b4 you take this bold step, to me a boyfriend relationship is not enough to this big problem into your home, what is his own share of commitment ? physically and financially or is he leaving the burden for you to carry just b/cos he feels that you are desperately in need of a man. There should be a proper discussion and agreement and rules before you accept them into your home.

    Answer by joysweet at 4:20 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • You are in for a treat make sure he's not using you just for childcare.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:09 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.