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Domestic Violence

On Tuesday my husband choked me and I passed out. He has never ever done this before we have been together for 7 years and This has never happened. I made him leave that night but now I miss him so much and he is saying that he does not want to be with me because I made him leave and he will never be with me again. What should I do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:17 PM on Jan. 9, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • Start the divorce process. Why would you want someone who can attempt to murder you. That's right I said attempted MURDER because that's what he did. You should have called the police on him and made an official report. Move on...he has some serious issues.

    legalmommy101

    Answer by legalmommy101 at 6:19 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • Divorce him,,I believe he's cheating anyway...no man leaves his wife without someone else on the side.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:24 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • Are you serious?!? Stay away no matter how bad it is. If you have seven years and it's the first time and he'd be freaked out in his own behavior enough to want to change or go to therapy and tell you his is sorry then maybe give him a chance, you know for love. But you make him leave 'cause he choked you and he is mad? I'm not trying to sound mean hun, but did you do something (no one ever deserves to be choked) that asks me if there is more to this story to make him not take any blame....if what you're saying is what happend STAY AWAY! Most ppl would just say plain stay away, but due to marriage and never doing it then I could see forgiving if therapy were involved and he were sorry. But if he is abusive type you just let him see he is in control again of everything..you begging him back, when he is the one who did the wrong!!
    Jeda624

    Answer by Jeda624 at 6:24 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • I'm sorry but I think you should be asking yourself ," why do you want him to come back?" He hurt you, phisically, a man put his hands around your neck and squeezed till u passed out.' Hello, in 7 yrs I don't understand what's going on, but no matter what, no one has the right to put their hands on another person unless asked to.'I went through a simillar situation when I was 18 with my daghters father, who was an alcoholic and later on got help for mental illness as well.Something like this happening doesn't jst stop after it starts.I hate to be the berrer of bad news.I'm sorry that your life is changeing but this to shall pass ,just ride the wave out.when one door closes another opens.He needs help from a professional NOT YOU.'
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:27 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • If the FIRST time he abuses you he tries to kill you, you need to get away. Call the police and report it. It doesn't matter that you didn't call right away, call them. He is dangerous. You need to think about your safety. I can understand you miss him but he doesn't love you - men do not abuse women they love. Get away and stay away. Get a restraining order. Talk to you local abused women's shelter. Please do not get back together with him, he is not right and very dangerous to you. And if you have children, you need to protect them too. Call a lawyer right away. Save yourself before it's too late.
    Allergic2Stupid

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 6:29 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • PS Respect yourself, you won't let him treat you that way & although you love him, you can't have that make him see that you mean business. But easier said than done, no one's comments on here can change your love or feelings for him. Whatever you deceide, think through...and stick with it. When it comes to abusice men, once they figure out you don't mean what you say when you don't stand behind your own decisions or leave when they've crossed the line they know they got you!!! They're in control! STAY AWAY FROM HIM! He may be cheating like ANON already said, since he isn't acting repentent, he didn't care enough to think of his 7 yr relationship with you to screw it up by chokign you, which mean he could've been drawing away from you in the last while...apart from the fact sounds like you're going to him wanting him back and he's done with you. get the divorce and stay away!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:30 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • So he tried to kill you? And he is now made because he had to leave? I'm sorry that just stuck out to me......
    As hard as it must be for you to have your whole world turned upside down, staying with this man is not the answer. He has problems you are not capable of solving, he needs professional help now. And the fact that he is telling you he can't be with you, sweetie that is a huge red flag ,HE FEELS NO REMORSE FOR WHAT HE DID. I'm not saying that would make it okay, but he sounds like a sociopath!
    bgcmommy

    Answer by bgcmommy at 6:45 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • He could have killed you. Please don't take him back. Call a shelter and ask them how to get started ridding yourself of him
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:00 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • seems like you have no choice.. he doesnt WANT you and you dont NEED him. there isnt alot of choices to make here.. move on and divorce him! Stay as far away as possible!!!!!!!!!Your LUCKy he stopped when you passed out, or you could be dead! next time he might not stop!
    maybebaby83

    Answer by maybebaby83 at 7:16 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

  • give it some time, dont call him,and if he calls blow him off like say u have something to do or something.after time when he sees u havent called and begging him back he will try to get u back,but first he needs to apoligze
    angelairelan

    Answer by angelairelan at 7:57 PM on Jan. 9, 2010

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